Midnight Pals: Sssspace Sstory 2 (Patreon)

JK Rowling: i don't need you lot!
Rowling: i don't need any of you!
Rowling: i'm gonna go over to sspace coven to tell my new sstory!
Barker: yeah have fun with that
Rowling: I will!!
Barker: they're all a bunch of nerds over there!
Poe: now clive that's not very fair
Barker: she's gonna find it out soon enough

[meanwhile, at space coven]
JK Rowling: hello children
Jules Verne: welcome, JK Rowling! I've been informed that you're the first woman ever to write
science fiction
Verne: so we're proud to make you a member of our very select group
Verne: welcome to super friends!!!

Verne: i am called Ham because I enjoy ham radio
Verne: [pointing to HG Wells] this is email
Verne: [pointing to Isaac Asimov] cosine
Verne: [pointing to Robert Heinlein] report card
Verne: [pointing to Frank Herbert] mescaline
Verne: [pointing to Mary Shelley] and Mary

HG Wells: [arriving in a steam-powered dirigible] excelsior, fellow space-ka-teers!
HG Wells: it is I, HG Wells, chrononaut extradinaire!
Wells: i am simply a-quiver to hear some new story and-
Wells: oh crap, the gears fell off my top hat
Jules Verne: don't worry, my good man, you can borrow some of mine!

Rowling: ok sso here'ss my futurisstic sstory
Verne: whoa you can't start a story like that!
Rowling: oh? oh right, ssorry
Rowling: i meant 'ssubmitted for the approval of sspace coven, i call-'
Verne: no i mean you're not wearing any goggles
Wells: every super friend must wear at least 3 pairs of goggles at all times
Verne: it's the law!

Verne: won't you enjoy some of our "mind control cookies" ho ho ho
Rowling: what
Verne: oh i'm sorry are you not familiar with the music of dr steel???
Verne: he's ONLY our favorite musician
Rowling:
Verne: OMG you've GOT to listen to People of Earth
Verne: it's SO funny
Verne: we're all members of the army of toy soldiers
Rowling:

Verne: [playing Dr Steel album] haha ok so this is my favorite part coming up
HG Wells: are you playing dr steel? turn that hack off!
Rowling: oh thank god
Wells: you should be playing Aurelio Voltaire!

Verne: Dr steel!
Wells: Voltaire!
Verne: Dr steel!
Wells: Voltaire!
Rowling: I've been insspired
Rowling: my next book is going to be a manifessto against the FuMP

Rowling: today i have an exciting new sstory for you!
Rowling: those plebss over at midnight ssociety couldn't appreciate this
Rowling: FUTURISTIC sstory!
Rowling: i think you ssci fi people will really get thiss
Wells: huzzah!
Verne: huzzah!

Rowling: okay sso
Rowling: jusst imagine
Rowling: a future world where a totalitarian government made up of blue-haired sspooniess and their antifa goon ssquad
Rowling: have made it illegal to be cisss
Rowling: one lone heroic terf is fighting for her right to be a gold sstar lessbian

Rowling: sssee, in the future, an evil coalition of transs autisstic fat people
Rowling: force innocent lesbianss to put pronounss in their bioss
Rowling: or get ssent to the woke gulag!
Rowling: where they're forced to apologize for their privilege!
HG Wells: i didn't understand any of that

Wells: i don't understand any of that
Verne: me neither
Robert Heinlein: me neither
Heinlein: except that one bit about a lesbian being involved
Heinlein: i did understand that word
Heinlein: and frankly i think i would like to hear more about lesbians