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This is difficult to express, but I need to be honest. It's been years of inconsistency in my posting and commissions, and I feel like I need to address it. There was a time when I was happy, drawing freely and sharing my work, brimming with ideas. But around 2019-2020, everything changed. I stopped creating for myself and began relying on you all to suggest what I should post, like during the BOWL events. These changes were a result of my struggle with depression at work and an abusive relationship. Eventually, I was diagnosed with severe depression and PTSD. It became harder to stay productive, so I distracted myself by taking on another job.
By 2020, I left that relationship, and things here began to improve slowly. However, I entered a new relationship in 2022, which has since ended in heartbreak just this week.
I dont know how to handle this, and honestly, I feel lost. To make matters worse, our country has been hit by four storms this November alone. I want to be okay, I really do, but it's incredibly hard right now. I apologize for the delays and stress I may have caused. Please know that I'm actively fighting through this, and if you are a religious person, I would deeply appreciate your prayers, as I feel stuck in this chapter of my life.
I recently quit my job, and though it feels embarrassing to admit, I need to secure 3-6 more commissions this month to cover my bills. I know it may seem ridiculous to ask, but keeping myself busy with these projects may help distract me, bring in some money, and ease the overthinking. I just need to get through this moment. The pain will eventually subside.
I know I have other work to finish, but right now, I also need financial help so I can focus on my responsibilities here without worrying about bills.
Thank you so much for your support. I’m truly sorry for everything not being okay, but I am fighting to overcome this difficult time.