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Redemption Arc 111 (Patreon)

Published:
2026-02-10 06:22:33
Imported:
2026-06

Comments

Jake

Ty for the chapter! 🫡

Robert Jang

Feel Miriam and Aurelia are going to enter ring to duke it out soon... look forward to future dis tracks from them both

rn

Lucian should’ve give Denzel heads-up or permission at least for using his financial account to pay Vlad. I don’t trust that weasel who might take more than he should if he’s greedy

Swinter

Err, why is Lucian *exceptionally* rude to Theobald for no reason what so ever in the first part of this chapter? (He's dismissive about Thobalds discomfort, shows No gratitude for the help, treats him more like a CEO would treat a janitor than a powerful ally...) I've been praising you quite a lot recently, but this bit is just plain weird in tone. It feels scattered and unfocused. We have four distinct scenes that has no through-line and end up feeling underbaked because of it, instead ending up feeling crammed and scattered. I'd say you'd make the entire story better by entirely cutting the scene with Theobald, it could be replaced by a single sentence in the carriage ride and it'd be an improvement. Overall, this feels like an awkward chapter that could probably have been better split into two, or even three. I'm not quite sold on the Vlad scene either, but it's slightly better. Also would have worked well by more time to breath, as you're dragging in a brand new character with no explanation to solve a random new problem. It feels like a Deus Ex Machina, but a very boring one. Overall, I'm hoping you get back to form again because, ish, this was a large downturn in quality.

Saddy Storm
>>202609886

He wasn't that rude lol I think they are more casual around eachother after that whole fiasco. Explains their sarcasm and quips. On the Deus Ex: it's very believable that among the 20 something playable characters there was a rogue type. Maybe should have spaced it a little before introducing but that's what I like about Nemo's stories, it's Not dragged on for ages. Something happens relevant every chapter.

rn

It’s always a fun time when Lucian commit crimes.

rn
>>202616147

It’s good that the team is a lot smaller for the trip to New Riverra Republic. Narrows into focus and raises the stakes. Stoked to see the other three unknown Student Ambassadors who are locals there

Arexio R.

ooo looking forward to getting closer with the new riverran ambassadors