The King ate everything...again! (Patreon)

When he woke up this morning, he wouldn’t stop saying how hungry he was. We measured his belly, empty at 44.5 inches! I was determined to keep him from wasting away. I knew I couldn’t keep him waiting long to fill up, so I ran out and bought as much as my grocery bags could carry: bread, cold cuts, peanut butter, oreos, chips ahoy, chocolate milk, and soda.

When I came back, he grabbed the bags from me before I could even close the door behind me. He gave me a little bro-shoulder pat and began to shove everything I had bought into his mouth. He was looking ravenous and untamable, like he always is.

**goff, munch, chew, swallow**

“BUUUUURRRRRRRP!”

There was no stopping him. He sat on the couch, grabbing everything out of the bags one by one and making them disappear. Within an hour, a box of oreos, a box of chips ahoy, all the chocolate milk, 4 cold cut sandwiches and 2 peanut butter sandwiches...all gone. He rose from his thrown with a beach and a fart and said, “let’s...brrrp...measure.” I was trembling so hard I couldn’t even hold the tape measure steady. He reached over, grabbed it from me, and slingshotted it around his gravitational pull. I grabbed my phone and was dumbstruck by the number.

50 inches! He grew over 5 inches in the span of an hour!😩💦 He looked down at me with that bro smirk he does, turned away and plopped down for a nap.

🙇🙇🙇