Just A Bit Off Mayhem: Chapter 7 (Patreon)

Chapter 7

As fun as it was to tease Sakura, she can't let herself get distracted even if the girl had a pair of very large and convincing distractions. "No!" Illya shook her head as she wrangled with the effigy of a rat, "Girls are forever. Bombs are temporary!" Wait, wasn't that supposed to be the other way around?

As she got up to grab some extra material, she felt a sudden sense of vertigo slam into her. "Woah there." Oh boy, this was a big one.With leaden limbs, she grabbed hold to the edge of a table as she waited for the nausea to pass by.

How long had he been awake again anyways? Since yesterday? Glancing at a nearby clock, he blinked. "Huh, is it already the day after?" She swore she just left Shirou's house, "Eh, no matter." She shrugged as she grabbed a spool of wire and got back to work.

Now some might say that she's working herself ragged here. She still had a month or so before Medea drops, but that was a month she had to stay near that golden turd. Muttering darkly, she stitched away, piecing together the vest for the rat effigy. Nothing like a good kick in the ovaries to remind her that she needed to up her game!

As her needles danced away, she yawned. "So tired…" Maybe she should sleep. She could just test this out tomorrow, but nah! Why sleep when she's on a roll! She had her bomb and the delivery system all but ready for deployment. "I just need a few finishing touches," She grinned as she tied the last bit of string, "And there!"

Taking a moment to admire her handiwork, she cackled. "Aren't you a cute little thing?" There, standing before her best work so far; An explosive laden vest for a rat. "You really out done yourself this time!" She patted herself.

If she was going to be honest, this would probably be nothing more of a distraction for that bastard, but this wasn't for him. "Now to see how big that boom is!" She purred as she gingerly grabbed the effigy before setting it down inside a tiny bounded field; Safety first!

Grabbing a recorder and her ear muffs, she skipped behind the nearby cover where Miss Weiss sat, nibbling on her plate of grains and assorted greens. Patting the albino rat, she made some last minute checks before nodding. It was now or never.

"Test Number 124 on using Reinforcement on Explosives!" Illya shouted at her recorder as she braced herself, "Detonation in three, two, one-!"

THUMP!

Feeling the wave of pressure slam against her even as the bounded field flashed was quite the experience. "Woo! Fuck yeah!" She pumped her fist. Who knew that reinforcing explosives made them quite potent. She was going to abuse the hell out of this.

Unfortunately for her, she had some naysayers. Staring up from her plate, Weiss sassed at her as she gave her a flat stare, "Squeak."

"Of course I have to use rats," Illya scoffed, "You guys can get everywhere." How else was she going to get this bomb up close to her target? Mail Bombs were boring while Rat Bombs were all the rage!

Still, a certain someone remained unimpressed. "Squeak…"

Biting her lips, Illya opened her mouth before shutting them shut as her companion made her point. "Ok fine, I'll make rat Avatars," She relented. Ok, maybe her idea about using suicide rat bombs were a bit too extreme and it'd be a pain to train up a whole new batch everytime.

"Squeek?" Weiss asked curiously.

"Oh right, Spielberg hasn't made that movie yet," Illya hissed as she slapped her forehead. Waving off her pet's concern, she answered, "You'll figure it out once I make your first sets of avatars." Who knows, maybe they'd love it!

All thoughts about ripping off the legendary director would come to a screeching halt as a loud banging echoed from the door. "Illya!" Atalanta roared as the reinforced doors struggled to contain the fury of the tiny pint sized lioness which had Miss Weiss fleeing to the closets, "I know you're in there!"

"Oh crap!" She's been found! Looking around and finding no escape, she shouted back, "No one's here! Go away!" Ok, that might not have been the best idea, but she was a little sleep deprived here!

That gave her Servant some pause, allowing her check for some hiding spots. Avoiding the closet, she rooted around her chest, emptying it just as her servant recovered,, "Ok Odysseus, I want you out here right now!"

"I refuse!" She shouted back as she stuffed herself inside. It was a bit awkward, having to bend her limbs, but she was comparatively tiny compared to this chest. Besides, she can't let them catch her. "You're just going to ruin my fun!" She had a lot of projects damn it.

That answer, however, did not please the Greek Heroine one bit. "Damn it all Illya," The woman hissed, "You've been up for two days straight."

"Actually, she's been up for 50…" Leysritt replied before she paused and corrected herself, "No, that's 51 hours straight."

As Illya awaited the inevitable siege, Atalanta sighed, "The point is you need a break." Jostling the door, she reasoned, "Have you even bathed much less eaten anything these past few days? Please, Illya, see the reason!"

But reason is boring and it's not like she was starving. "I have snacks!" Now she might have to steal some granola from Miss Weiss, but that's why she fed her with good food! So that she could mooch off her when necessary!

"You know what I mean young lady!" Atalanta shouted as the jostling stopped; Uh-oh. "You need a proper meal and a good long bath!" As Illya weaved herself a spell, her servant warned her, "I'm only going to say this once. Come out, now!"

Illya considered it for a moment, on how much easier it'd be if she just submitted, but nope! Not going to happen. "I don't wanna!" If she was going to come out of this, it'd be by her choice and her choice alone!

"Fine, you asked for this!" Atalanta shouted as something big and heavy thumped against the door.

"Clear!" Was all the warning she'd get before her door exploded into splinters, revealing a pissed off Atalanta out on the hunt. Eyes narrowed, she stalked the room, ears perked as she searched for. Too bad, she already had her hiding warded against making any sound. She was as silent as a doormouse!

Unfortunately, she hadn't warded for every sense as the woman took one whiff before turning to the box. Making a break for it, Illya screamed, "You'd never get me alive!" She was too pretty of a girl to get captured!

Running from the fastest Greek heroine would prove foolhardy as hands yanked at the back of her collar. "Gotcha!" Now, a proper Master would have surrendered and allowed her servant to do as she pleased, but she didn't just spend 50 hours working on a vest for a rat. She spent 49 on it working on her dolls!

"Bleh" Head turning, she stuck her tongue at her wide eyed servant. She had won, that was until Atalanta pivoted and threw her right at her true hiding spot, the closet, "W-wait no!" Clutching Miss Weiss, both of them screamed as her life-like doll's panic filled face glowed before everything turned white.

BOOM

-x-x-x-

Note to self, do not try to mess with her servant. She was way faster than even the trigger mechanism to her bomb. Now, she had to suffer the indignity of being captured and restrained by her cruel captors! Curse them and their bubbly baths!

With Illya sitting on Atalanta's app, the half homonculi merely grumbled as Atalanta washed her hair while they soaked in the luxurious baths of the castle. The fact that she was soaking in hot water did little to sooth her bruised ego which was made worse as Atalanta rubbed her victory at her. "And what did we learn today?" Her traitorous servant asked as she lathered her soot colored hair.

"That I need to make the priming mechanism faster?" She sassed back before flinching at Atalanta's scolding glare. "Ok, fine," She relented, "I learned that trying to catch up to lost time by overworking is dumb." And that being scared was no excuse to work herself down to the bone. It was all for good reason though!

Turning to her maid for support, she would find no ally. "Mistress is a dumbass," Leysritt nodded as she knelt beside them.

Pouting, Illya snapped, "Shut it you"

"Now, now, Illya. Leysritt is merely telling the truth," Atalanta replied with a teasing smile.

Clutching her chest in mock pain, Illya gasped, "Et tu Archer!?" She had no allies, just harpies looking to abuse her cute and tiny form! "Traitors, the lot of you!"

"It seems the mistress is suffering another bout of megalomania and delusion," Leysritt noted as she poured some scented water into the hot stone, filling the room with the lovely scent of rose. "Shall I administer the horse sedatives?"

Turning, Ilya stared at the girl, "Wait what?"

"No, there's no need for that anymore," Atalanta answered, only further confusing Illya even more as she glared at her servant. "Now that we have her, you can store it back in the medicine cabinet."

Glancing between her servants, she sighed. "Ok, I understand why you needed the horse sedative," She replied. She might have messed with them by relocating her workshop and hiding inside the mansion, "But how did you get some?"

"That's not important right now, Mistress" Sella replied, dodging the topic, "Right now, mistress needs to be cleaned."

"Yeah yeah," Rolling her eyes, Illya sank deeper into the water. Closing her eyes and soaking in the heat from the bath, she sighed, "Mmmm, this is amazing." Already, she could feel the tension in her body melting away and her mind growing drowsier by the minute. It was… relaxing.

"I really should have tested out the castles bath before I worked on my project," She yawned as she fought off the sandman. Maybe then, they wouldn't have pounced on her so hard.

"You could have joined us here earlier if you haven't forced us to play hide and seek, Illya," Atalanta replied as she grabbed a bucket and rinsed the soup off her hair, "I swear your worst, Medea when she's in the mood."

"Speaking off, Why did you make yourself an automaton copy?" Her Servant asked as she stroked her hair. Eyes narrowed, she muttered, "I do hope it's nothing unsavory…"

Staring back, Illya laughed. "Oh no, nothing like that but now that you mentioned it…" She grinned, stroking her chin before she felt the looming presence of Atalanta's hands over her head. Cowering, she held up her hands, "I kid, I kid." Can't a girl make a lewd joke?

Leaning back and resting her head against the girl's chest, she stared up at the ceiling before she answered, "But seriously, I kinda needed these dolls for one thing." Aside from being mobile landmines and body double that is.

Brows raised, Atalanta asked, "And that is?"

"I forgot to say hi to the Second Owner of Fuyuki?" Illya answered with a wince. In her defense, she didn't really need to talk to her, but it was common courtesy since she was going to stay near Fuyuki for a while.

It would have been a good call to chat Rin up with what she planned. Now though, how was she going to convince this hypercompetitive girl to join her after this insult. "Tomorrow's going to be a long day, isn't it?"

A/N:

Ok, that's the last bit of that for now. Till next month! Tommorow, I'll post the result of the polls and hopefully get that done... maybe after some of that RWBY Comm. Really sorry, but doing those comms early so I got all the time in the world to work away at the winners.