Wretched Joy 27 (Patreon)

Commissioned by southmonk

Wretched Joy

Chapter 27

-VB-

I brought my sword up to chop the legs off of this wannabe escapist pedophile.

He was the fifteenth criminal I’d come for, but unlike the others, he had been deep in the Docks. 

And then I brought my sword down.

The coward squealed … but then there was a clash of steel on steel.

For a second, I saw an oni-masked man wielding swords standing guard in front of the pedophile, having parried my attack.

I recognized him instantly. 

Oni Lee. 

I immediately struck back, twisting the momentum with sheer muscle strength natural and unnatural both, and my sword sliced through his throat before he could defend himself.

But then he turned to ash.

Growling, I whirled around just in time to see -.

I caught the grenade in my hand.

“... Oh bugg-.”

The grenade and the world flashed white. 

And then heat poured over me. 

-VB-

“... He caught the grenade?” Lung asked Lee.

“Yes,” his lieutenant replied blankly. “He looked surprised.”

Lung snorted. “So the furyo is hurt.”

“Hai.”

“Good.”

Lung didn’t think for a second that the punk was dead or crippled. That’s why he said ‘hurt’ while speaking to Oni Lee and his non-cape lieutenants while listening to the conversation in the background. 

No, he’d seen enough about the murderous vigilante to know that he wasn’t one to go down so easily. A grenade might have just pissed him off, too. 

Heh. 

The entirety of the Empire Eighty-Eight floundered and died to the solo vigilante without ever striking back at him, but here he was, hurting the bastard before he could come after him and his. 

It certainly made him feel good about having allowed Oni Lee to strike at Everyday Joe after he hunted down two of the ABB’s business associates. 

Oh, he knew about their discretion, but he hadn’t cared as long as he kept donating and facilitating money laundering. Was that bad for him to admit? If he said it publicly, then perhaps, yes. If one ignored the fact that he was Lung and Lung didn’t care. 

But he wasn’t stupid. Supporting/ignoring a pedophile publicly was a sure fire way to lose support quickly, and though he didn’t need support, life was a little less convenient without it. 

Crash.

He paused. 

Crash. Thud.

“... Lee. See what that’s about,” he ordered with a grunt. 

Oni Lee bowed and walked out of the room along with few of the lieutenants. 

Or rather, he would have. 

The door opened and there was a flash.

Not a flash of light that stunned everyone or a flash of camera that caught them all in a compromising position. 

No, it was a flash of steel.

And Oni Lee … dropped to his knees without a head. 

It landed on the ground with a heavy thud. 

Lung shot up from where he sat, wrath already filling him up like a bubbling volcano. “Who dares -?!” 

And then his throat shut when he saw who it was on the other side of the doorway. 

Because on the other side of the doorway was none other than Everyday Joe. His costume was scorched all throughout, but he didn’t 

“Lung…!” Joe hissed loudly. 

The unpowered lieutenants started backing away. 

“... Joe,” he hissed right back. “You -!”

Joe brought out a sickle.

And then everything went to shit.

-VB-

“Where is it happening?” Alexandria demanded as she flew over the city from the south to the north. 

“[It’s happening in the Docks, Alexandria.]” Battery, who was on console today, relayed the information. “[It’s a second Nightmare Circle.]”

Alexandria grimaced. She couldn’t enter it without exposing herself. And the optics would be nightmarish. “How big is it?” 

“[Half a mile across. H-. Oh. Oh God, that’s Lung.]”

Shit.

She pushed herself faster across the sky, breaking the sound barrier as she did so.

And then she saw it. 

Lung. He was out in the street already and growing. He was staggering drunkenly - his power must be allowing him to stay away somehow but not well enough - as he tried to swipe at a leisurely dodging and countering figure in white. 

Everyday Joe.

This was it. 

This was her chance to bring him in.

… But they were still inside the Nightmare Circle. If she entered it, then she would lose consciousness. 

Alexandria landed just outside of it on top of a rooftop and brainstormed as Joe and Lung duked it out. 

And then she had an idea. 

She reached down to her feet where there were gravel and bricks, grabbed a couple bricks, and flew up.

Then she aimed.

And threw.

The bricks cracked the air as they broke the sound barrier and whistled down toward Joe. 

Who -.

-raised his sword up as he spun out of the way and cut the brick with its own momentum.

He stopped and looked up at her, barely paying attention to Lung’s still staggering form. 

Alexandria glared down at the vigilante, not that it would show through her visor.

Then he disappeared. 

Her back suddenly lurched as she felt something bloom across her back. 

She staggered forward in the air, dropping a dozen feet in surprise, and whirled around. 

And that’s when she realized that she had just felt pain.

“Interrupting my fight, bitch?” Joe snarled while he floated in the air effortlessly. “Why don’t you go make yourself more useful and start arresting some scum?” 

She glared at him before she rushed forward with speed that Legend had hard time to match once upon a time. 

She punched and struck with enough force to shatter buildings, and he flung away from her. 

She screamed again when she felt another burning hot line open up, this time along the back of her thigh. She whirled around again.

“Is stabbing someone in the back the only thing you know how to do?” she sneered at Joe, who had teleported again. 

“You mean like how you and the rest of Cauldron depend on the Pyrrhic Path?” 

She froze. 

“... what?”

“You dipshit pisstards are incapable of critical thinking,” he spat at her as he aimed his sword at her. “You think that Eden’s parts aren’t geared towards conflict? You think that the Path is leading you and your merry band of would-be saviors to a grand victory for humans?!” 

Then he teleported and struck her again.

This time, she kicked and parried his strike before countering with a jab of her own. 

He took the hit; it was obvious that he just wasn’t fast enough to dodge her attacks. 

“You let a little kid with no real world experience dictate your actions! Her mind clouded and manipulated by a shard of the entities that all compete to be the one to solve Entropy! You think that Shards don’t have plans of their own?! RETARDS!” he roared.

Then he chain-teleported faster than she could react.

She brought her arms up and guarded her face. 

Painful cuts appeared all over her. Her hair got cut. Her costume got cut. Her helmet got cut. 

And finally, he stopped and teleported outside of her immediate reach.

“You better not interfere again, you hear me, Rebecca?” he snapped at her before teleporting away. 

And then she saw him reappear next to Lung and stab him through the heart from the back.

Lung staggered forward, crashed into the ground, and then … didn’t get up.

And Joe was staring up at her. 

His message was clear. 

He can kill her just like he killed Kaiser and Lung with that sword of his. Don’t make him use it.

And then, after full three tense minutes, he pulled his sword out and teleported away. 

“... Fuck,” she hissed… in pain and frustration. 

How did he know? What did he know?!

… And was any of what he said true? 

-VB-

… I’m definitely not acting like myself. 

After getting grenaded by Oni Lee, I got angry and took all of my enchanted gear with me to take on Lung. 

But I didn’t think rationally. I simply acted. Emotions clouded my mind like an algal bloom over a summer pond. 

That made my power’s limitations very clear. 

I facepalmed as I draped myself over my couch. 

And, of course, I just shouted everything I knew and suspected about Cauldron and the Shards to Alexandria, even going so far as to taunt her with her “real” name. 

“... Ugh, I need a drink and a video game.”

Too bad Earth Bet’s video game industry made EA look like a godsend.