Debaucherous x Division 2 (Patreon)

Commissioned

Debaucherous x Divison

Chapter 2

-VB-

Cooperland, rimward periphery

3020.05.10

It’s been a little over a week since I got Ernest Echevalier’s Template.

And boy, did that kid only have mechs in mind. 

Unfortunately for his abilities, knowledge, and legacy, I was not in the universe of his first or second life; there was no magic or other wonder materials in this universe to bypass mundane limitations. 

Not yet, anyways. 

But I had to start somewhere, and that somewhere was in figuring out the differences in how Ernesti’s knights and this universe’s battlemechs moved. Knights of Ernesti’s world used alchemically altered crystalline muscles while battlemechs used myomers for movement (most of them, anyways). 

I knew (from reading about myomers on the Slutlife provided multiversal internet) that battlemech myomers were “microscopic polyacetylene tubes filled with acti-strandular fiber,” of which the fiber was a bioindustrial product that were grown rather than manufactured. 

This meant that myomers were not what I needed to focus on for my first experiments. 

No, what I needed to focus on was something far more ubiquitous: armor and structure. If the structure could not withstand the pressure exerted by the myomer, then the mech would break from within. If the armor could not protect the structure and myomer, then neither of those mattered. 

So I began to experiment with internal structure material and armor. 

As my mining clones turned the mountain into an ant hill and produced a literal small hill of materials for my experimentation, my experimenting clones put those materials to use. 

We burned.

We melted.

We smithed.

We printed. 

We crystallized. 

We did everything we could do with near infinite materials and the internet at our fingertips! 

Um.

Yeah, that sounded cool but in actuality, we spent a lot of time repeating the same thing in sets to produce tools.

I spent most of the month making the tools needed to make the tools that will actually do the experimenting bit, and I had to do it this way because 1) I refused to spend precious points over lab equipment and 2) the locals were, as stated before, miners and spaceport operators. The closest thing to a metallurgy lab was a local welder’s workshop who lived in the spaceport city some fifty kilometers from where I set up my base. 

So after that month, I had a facility in one of the mining shafts specifically for high end metallurgy as well as multiple other shafts for intermediate tool making and production. 

So if it took me a whole month to just get to the experimenting stage, then the actual experiments were going to … probably take longer. 

Hell, I must just spend a year or two just building shit like a true American.

We be building shit, dawg.

Speaking of which, I knew that I wasn’t going to be going for standard battlemechs.

And yes, I was going to build battlemechs because why the fuck wouldn’t I? I was in the goddamn Battletech universe; I wanted to BATTLETECH! 

It helped that I had clones to do a lot of the things, but at the same time, clones didn’t and couldn’t fill every role. 

Which meant I needed to test things like drones, too. 

Which meant more time spent researching, experimenting, and practicing. 

Which meant… I may as well make Cooperland my home. Make a little kingdom here. I was always going to have to make a little kingdom, so why not here? 

Which was why I was out here in the nearest town, actually talking to people instead of just doing business. 

“So that’s the kind of problem you’re having around here, huh?” I muttered as I talked to half a dozen old men and women who were hanging around the town hall.

“Money’s tight as it is,” the youngest of them, Michael, grunted. “We can barely get enough food for ourselves on the ground because of how cold this world is, and food shipments are never on time.” A pause. “And where are you from, lad?”

“I’ve been living up in those mountains up there,” I said while gesturing to the nearest mountain range.

The elders looked to where I was pointing before looking back at me. 

“Up there? In the Cold Ranges?”

“Yup.”

“You have a death wish, lad?”

“Nope. I’ve got a crew up there, and we’ve dug into the mountains. What about you guys? It seems like you lot are having a harder time than I am.” A pause. “I’m selling food since I’ve got an underground hydroponics.”

The elders looked at each other. “We’ll go and tell the mayor that. He can set something up with you.”

“Cool. And do yall have any trucks for sale or something?”

---

The mayor of the “Tor Town,” called that because they mined up a mineral that they called Tornite, was more than happy to set up a deal with me for food. I sold them watermelon, wheat, and carrots, and I got some much needed cash to trade with other people.

Not that the locals had anything worth buying.

I was just about to leave Tor Town when I spotted something. 

It was a pair of women leaving a grocery store. They looked worse for wear in this cold, tundra world and the grocer looked sorry even as he rejected something from them.

I drove my new used truck over to the grocery, half-interested in buying food that wasn’t wheat, beet, watermelon, or carrot, half-interested in what was happening. 

I got out of my truck and waved at the grocer who was still at the front door, looking over the pair walking away. The grocer waved at me, still a little wary of the outsider.

“Do you have food that isn’t wheat, watermelon, beet, or carrot?”

The grocer blinked and let out a bark. “Oh man, are they the only thing you’ve been eating?”

“Yes.”

“... Jesus Christ. Yeah, come on in. I’ve got a few more vegetables than that.”

As I walked in, I couldn’t help but glance over my shoulder. “What’s up with them?”

The grocer paused and then scratched his beard. “Ah, well… Their parents both died in a workplace accident a few weeks back.”

I nodded with a grimace. 

Then I hesitated before reaching into my pocket and pulling out some bills.

“Can you get me a pair of vegetables each and a pound of meat? And everything else for the two if they ever come back.”

He looked surprised. “I … didn’t expect you to care.”

I snorted. “You lot are my closest neighbors. I should start caring, no?”

He snorted right back at me. “People aren’t going to appreciate handouts around here, son.”

“Good. I don’t intend to give handouts every time I visit the town. The faster they get on their own two feet, the better it is for everyone.”

-VB-

Cooperland, rimward periphery

3020.05.17

I looked at my Company phone as another two points got banked into my account.

Just as I was about to put my phone away, though, a pop-up appeared. 

[Flash sales! Used Waifus and Husbandos! Flash sales!]

I blinked.

This was the first time I saw something like this show up on the Company phone, and despite my initial wariness, I tapped on the pop-up.

A new app downloaded itself onto my phone. 

“Marketplace?” I read out the app’s name with a hum before opening it. 

There was a loading sequence of delivery cardboard boxes, pink heart signs, and other company-affiliated emojis. Then it transitioned to the main menu. It showed me my point account on the top right and four main options in the middle. 

Companions

Materials

Goods/Services

Auction

Huh. 

Now, this looked more like what a multiversal company should be like. 

I pressed on Materials (because that’s kind of what I needed the most). It didn’t show me any items, so I put down “mech and stuff” on the search bar… and my eyes popped out. 

SCV (Starcraft) - 1 point, used

Goaliath (Starcraft) - 1 point, used

RPI-11 Glasglow x5 (Code Geass) - 1 point, very used, damaged

MS-06 Zaku II (Gundam) - 2 points, used, damaged

IPS-N Nelson (Lancer TTRPG) - 5 points, used

O11 Melander (Armored Core 6) - 3 points, slightly used

…[More]

The list went on and on and on.

But what caught my eye was the Nelson.

Why? 

Aside from the fact that it was a mech from Lancer TTRPG, a properly fitted Nelson can go up to the speed of sound on flat terrain and maneuverable enough to use that speed to actively dodge incoming projectiles, lasers, and melee weapons. 

I would buy a Nelson if only to try to reverse-engineer that shit… and to stab an assault mech in the face with a speartip that goes boom. Because Nelsons were melee mechs with no ranged options. 

While having a Nelson would be interesting, it was more important for me to have an easily reverse-engineer-able option like Glasglow. Not only should it be something I could figure out with my current Template and maybe a Science Talent, but upsizing and fitting in a fusion reactor shouldn’t be too difficult. 

(I hope.)

You know what? Let’s do that. It’s five Glasglows for just 1 point. Even if all of them are heavily damaged, then that just meant I could disassemble all of them to reverse engineer all of the components.

The question would be if I could use Minecraft’s crafting system to craft each and every single one of the components.

With a click, I bought them, and there was a thoom as they appeared in the storage. The storage guarding clone exploded into expletives even though my clones and I all knew it was coming. It was that sudden and quick in its appearance. 

Soon enough, most of my free clones hurried over to Storage 7 to start looking over the mechs. 

As for me, I switched over from looking at Materials to looking at Companions. 

I raised an eyebrow. 

List by Original’s Popularity

Name - Point Cost - Current Tier - Original Tier - Category

Ruby Rose - 10 point - Tier 5 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Ruby Rose - 2 point - Tier 2 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Ruby Rose - 1 point - Tier 1 - Tier 5 - Faulty Clone [See Listing]

Hyuga Hinata - 10 point - Tier 5 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Hyuga Hinata - 2 point - Tier 2 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Hyuga Hinata - 1 point - Tier 1 - Tier 5 - Fault Clone [See Listing]

Hyuga Hinata - 1 point - Tier 1 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Yaoyorozu Momo - 5 point - Tier 4 - Tier 4 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Yaoyorozu Momo - 2 point - Tier 2 - Tier 4 - Faulty Clone [See Listing]

Yaoyorozu Momo - 1 point - Tier 1 - Tier 4 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Tohsaka Rin - 10 point - Tier 5 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Tohsaka Rin - 2 point - Tier 2 - Tier 5 - Used Goods [See Listing]

Tohsaka Rin - 1 point - Tier 2 - Tier 5 - Faulty Clone [See Listing]

…

On and on it went. 

‘That’s… a lot of waifus,’ I thought to myself in surprise. ‘But what makes a Companion “used good” or “faulty clone”?’

I pressed on the terms and found the definition and examples for them easily. 

Used Goods

Companions that have been Stamped and held in possession of a Contractor. Due to a lack of a will or contract regarding these companions after the Contractor’s death, they have been foreclosed to the Slutlife Company. 

Faulty Clone

Not all clones created by the Slutlife Company result in a perfect copy of their templates. These clones have something wrong with them, whether it is a lack of memory, a personality disorder/alteration, bodily deformation, or else. Due to their damage, they are sold at a heavy discount. Faulty Clones are not sold to new Contractors who are starting out their journey. 

“So what makes one ‘Used Goods’ different from another to warrant lower tier and price?”

Used Goods - Lower Tier

These companions have been heavily damaged under their previous owners. While most damages have been fixed through the Company’s patented Fix-All Spray™, not all damages have been fixed. The most initial example of such damage is the mental trauma of losing their Contractor husband as a result of their connection severing violently. This severing can result in damages similar to mania, depression, psychosis, etc…

Curious, I looked through the list and clicked on two different listings for Hyuga Hinata. 

For higher Tier Used Goods listing, most of the listed damages were as suggested by the Company’s definition. Mental trauma, depression, and so on. 

For the lowest Tier Used Goods listing… that was not the case. 

Selling a well-trained Hinata-chan

Hyuga Hinata, 20 years old

Sexually broken in. Will respond to the owner’s call for sex.

Slutlife Company guaranteed Fix-All Sprayed. 

Will happily give you babies. Don’t expect parenting from her; she’s a fuck toy. 

Minimally used. 

A lot of the listings were exactly like that. 

Like… Wow. 

I knew that Slutlife Company had degenerates that treated people like objects, but it was one thing to know it and another thing entirely to see it. 

I didn’t dare to click on any of the listings that involve “gore,” “hooked,” “limbless,” “headless-technically alive,” or any other fetishes like them. 

While I didn’t want to be perusing this section as a whole, I … had a need for people who knew what they were doing when it came to mechs, science, and engineering. 

I looked through the list and my eyes caught something that interested me. 

Selling Tina and Wiska

Only Stamped and fucked just once. 

Dwarves women, even when slim, just aren’t my style. 

Very good engineers and mechanics, though. 

Shame I only keep around women I want to fuck.

Tina and Wiska… Their Companion listing said they were from [Reborn as a Space Mercenary]. It was a universe about space empires, pirates, mercenaries, and … some mechs here and there. 

I could work with that. 

And they were being sold for only 4 points together, which was 2 points less than if I were to buy them separately and at full price. 

I thought about it. 

For five points, I could get two cute mechanics and a five ultra-light mechs. There was nothing else I could buy that would be well spent as that combo except maybe only buying a Nelson mech.

I decided to go for it. 

As soon as I bought them, my clone in Storage 11 jumped in surprise as five beat-up Glasglows appeared in a dim white flash while I froze stiff when two girls appeared in my living room. The red-haired dwarf girl, Tina, froze stiff while the blue-haired dwarf girl, Wiska, looked around, spotted me, and gave me a slight curtsy. If I remembered my lore correctly about them, then Tina was the rough and tumble twin while Wiska was the more proper and formally educated of the two.

“Are you our new master?” she asked with a … slight tremble to her voice. 

“I am,” I answered. “Your names?”

“Wiska.”

And after a moment, the blue-haired dwarf elbowed her sister. 

Tina, who looked like she was seesawing between murdering me and fucking me, finally gave me a stiff nod. “Tina.”

“I’ve bought you two as my waifus,” I told them bluntly. “But more so for your expertise as mechanics and engineers than as women.”

“You have something against dwergr women?” Tina asked with a gimlet eye. 

“... You mean aside from size difference?”

“... Yeah?” she suddenly didn’t look like she was sure about this while her sister, Wiska, facepalmed. 

“You two don’t like you’e graduated high school.”

“What?! I’m twenty-seven!” To our surprise, it was Wiska who shouted indignantly. 

“I mean… if you think I look that young, I’m not gonna correct ya,” Tina, on the other hand, looked flattered. 

I looked between them. “You two are really twenty-seven?” I asked. But there was something else to the point of drawing this conversation away from our working relationship.

They were “used goods.” They just fell in love with someone (through real seduction, supernatural charm, or Stamp’s capture process), had sex with them, and then were sold off. Even if the Capture process had now been transferred over to me and thus they were in love with me, they knew what was happening and probably felt incredibly dirty at the very least. 

“Yes, we are,” Wiska insisted with narrowed eyes. “Unless you thought you were buying children as your waifus?” she asked, though it was close to an accusation.

“Nah, I knew you two were dwarves,” I replied with a grunt. “But that’s what you are here for! I’m in a universe where space ships are primitive and mechs dominate the planetary battles!” 

My words got their attention.

“... How primitive?” Tina asked apprehensively. 

“Small ships under half a kilometer in length can’t go FTL. Oh, and there’s only one FTL method, and that’s having a giant germanium core that takes up like 90% of the ship’s mass.”

Their jaws dropped. 

“You brought us to the stone ages?!” 

Yeah, I definitely distracted them from the slave-waifu bit.