My Birthday (Patreon)

Today, December 28th, I turned 28 years old 💫

Everyone knows me as a volunteer, as a successful photographer, model and as an eternally positive person who does not give up and has been fighting a disease for more than two years that no one can diagnose. But few people know me as a person who cries when I’m left alone, who has thought about death countless times over these two years, just to no longer feel this unimaginable physical pain every day of his life. Sometimes it seems to me that I no longer remember what it’s like to feel different, when you don’t have pain, when you can play sports, travel and walk in the mountains. I often try to console myself with the thought that during these two years the war took away from other people not only their health, but also their home, the lives of loved ones and mental health, so I tried not to complain about life, but to be grateful for what I have. There is what you have taken for granted all your life - for the ability to see, speak, hear smells, hear sounds, for the opportunity to walk with your own feet and do something wonderful with your own hands. And I am forced to endlessly balance between despair from yet another unsuccessful treatment and between what I have. Someone is absolutely sure, despite unsuccessful treatment and good tests, that I have rheumatism, fibromyalgia, muscle tension syndrome, etc. But I don’t believe in all these diagnoses, not only because the treatment does not help, but also because I still have a tiny hope that I am an absolutely healthy person and one day I will wake up and I will be free from pain. Appreciate what you have, even if it seems like it's worthless. Sometimes even the ability to stand on the street on your own two feet and look up at the sky, inhale hundreds of different smells and be able to go absolutely wherever you want is a huge gift given to us from birth and which people do not appreciate at all. Thank you to everyone who supports me all this time, who stays with me and helps - you are my miracle, for which I thank heaven every day of my life.

Your Anastasia ♥️