Book 7, Chapters 59, 60, 61. + DragonCon info (Patreon)

I know I always say this, so I hope you believe me when I call this out as an asshole-tier cliffhanger, on par with that Game of Thrones cliffhanger from last night.

They're all going to be like this from now on.

DragonCon info at the bottom.


Chapter 59

<Note Added by Crawler Tin, 21st edition>

The city of Larracos has something called a Deflector Tower installed in it. I’m not 100% certain how they work. The towers deflect not projectiles, but gods. They deter gods from entering an area protected by the tower, but apparently, it’s not a perfect system. If a god is enraged enough, it may break through. And if you summon a deity inside the area of a deflector tower, the summoning still works. Of special interest, I overheard two Dream elves speaking of the towers, and they say if the god is sponsored, they absolutely can’t enter an area protected by a deflector tower. Apparently this whole system was invented after a season where a pair of gods brought Faction Wars to an abrupt halt in a matter of hours.

These towers only work in cities, and on the castles of the Faction Wars participants. I think. I believe—but I could be wrong—that these towers only exist on the ninth floor, which is unfortunate as I believe the gods will be everywhere on the deeper floors.

~

<Note Added by Crawler Priestly, 14th Edition>

Last season, the Dreadnaughts were victorious in Faction Wars. And while they are clearly outmatched by the orcs this season, they were given the northernmost castle, in spot number one, and it is in this castle where I am currently bivouacked. The castle is called The King’s Point. This location is always awarded to the previous season’s winner, so it often changes hands. The pre-built castle is nestled atop the only mountains in this game. There is snow here, though apparently the weather varies from season to season.

I must admit, being stationed at this castle is preferable to any of the other locations, as those must all be built from the ground up. And while the construction of this castle is nothing like that beautiful place, Larracos, it is good to have a solid roof over my head, even if it leaks. The walls are well-defended. It comes with its own Deflector Tower, though it seems this season that the interdiction of deities will be at a minimum. That, too, varies from season to season. And while it’s certainly better than being out in the cold, the castle is drafty. Still, warmth can be found here. The castle is heated by vents in the floor. The other conscripts and I fight one another for the spots closest to the outlets. I am not certain of the source of the heat, but I am assuming it is supposed to mimic a geothermic vent. This whole floor is supposedly built inside of an enormous volcano, after all. 

~

<Note Added by Crawler Carl, 25th edition>

Operation: Ruin consists of four separate offensives, followed by what Donut calls the “Coup De War Crime.”

Each of the four offensives kick off simultaneously and will have multiple, coordinated prongs.

If all goes to plan, everything should be done within a few hours. And since it never goes to plan, we have multiple contingencies in place including two rapid-deploy battalions ready to teleport to any part of the battlefield at any moment.

In addition, we will have support from Juice Box and the NPC team for all four offensives. Britney will coordinate all of our communication with Team Retribution. It seems she’s become quite close with Juice Box. She’s gotten very good at being a go-between, working multiple lines of communication with the skill of a seasoned police dispatcher.  

I’ll be making different entries summarizing each part of the plan. For this entry, I will outline our plan with our enemies to the north. King Stalwart and the orcs.

Here is our plan for the first of the four offensives.

Objective: Immediate destruction and defeat of the Skull Clan.

Secondary Objective: Accomplish primary objective without engaging the war mages at all, thus capturing them before they can cause too much havoc. 

The main coordinator of this assault is Florin. 

The orcs supposedly have the largest concentration of war mages, and we must deal a decisive blow against them and King Stalwart as quickly as possible. And because their castle, called The King’s Point, is nestled in a mountainous region, and relatively far from the border with Shanty Town, this is one of the few locations on the map that is out of range of Donut in the Nest.

The good news is their location will ultimately be their doom.

The moment the timer ends, we are hitting the orcs with a three-prong attack:

*Prong one. The ground assault. Florin and the 101st will surge forward into Skull Clan territory, meeting the existing defenders head-on. Meanwhile, the hidden company of captured Weeper tanks—which Florin insists are safe despite recent evidence that they just randomly blow up—will surge forward from their hiding spots in Shanty Town. That area quickly turns mountainous, and they won’t be able to roll all the way to the orc castle, but they will be able to keep the orcs from retreating toward Shanty Town when they inevitably flee.

*Prong two. At the same time, our aerial assault will begin. Louis will launch from our hidden base and weapons depot in the far eastern forest. We call this Area 52. He will launch with a full load of Waffle Makers and a special type of bomb that the system calls No Disassemble, which does no damage but is especially effective against both magical and technological shields.

(Incidentally, the No Disassemble bombs will supposedly work against the part-robot Reavers themselves, literally turning them off, so we have stockpiled a great number of them for Louis’s second run.)

Intelligence indicates the orcs have a robust air defense network, so Louis will be scraping the ceiling. He will bombard the castle with his entire load, though I suspect the bombs will only have a small impact. Still, it’s important that the No Disassemble bombs tax their castle shields as much as possible. This should keep the defenders busy and distracted long enough for him to drop me and Samantha west of the castle, near the border with the Reavers. After, he will circle back, reload, and then move on to his next objective.

This will also, hopefully, soften the target for the main blow.    

*Prong three. This is from below. The moment the shields are weakened, the Semeru dwarves will be making their first of several big statements today. In a day filled with big, over-the-top displays of power, this one is going to be hard to beat.

~

Samantha floated into the cabin of Party Planner, squeezed between the bombs, and parked herself on my lap. She was quivering with excitement. She smelled like bourbon and cigar smoke. Her neck was doing that revolting thing where it wriggled back and forth. My leg burned slightly when she rubbed her stump against bare skin.

“Where have you been?” I asked, rearranging her. “We almost had to leave without you. And who did that to your hair?”

“I was entertaining the GIs, Carl. Soldiers always need comfort just before a major battle. And Kiwi did it to my hair. For a one-eyed preggo who used to be a dinosaur, she sure has deft fingers. I would’ve made a move on her if Mongo wasn’t right there and if we had a bag handy. Do you know that when you and Donut are in the planning room doing planning stuff, Mongo goes in the kitchens and sniffs Kiwi’s butt so much she has to swat him away? Anyway, don’t you just love my hair? They’re called victory rolls! Aren’t they elegant? By the way, do you know what G.I. stands for? Louis says it stands for ground infantry, but Florin said it actually means galvanized iron, so of course I had to threaten Florin’s alligator mother, and he said his mother wasn’t even an alligator which got us all talking about Kiwi again. She’s going to be giving birth any day now. Isn’t that exciting? But I just love my hair like this. I told Kiwi when I get my body back, she can move in with me and my king and do my hair like that every day as long as her mongrel babies are potty trained and don’t come out too ugly.”

Her hair was in some complicated, 1940’s style with two giant swirls. The whole thing was going to fall apart the moment we dumped out of Party Planner. It wasn’t quite a pompadour, but I was suddenly reminded of Fire Brandy the lesser demon from the Iron Tangle.   

Mordecai had been playing WWII and Vietnam war movies in the saferoom for some of the younger changelings, and Samantha had been watching them, too. The kids had been angry at my whole “No child soldier” pronouncement, especially since someone pointed out that Donut was younger than most of them. Mordecai thought that showing them war movies, such as Hamburger Hill, Platoon, and Saving Private Ryan—movies that focused on the horrors of war—would help dissuade the kids from wanting to get in on the action. Predictably, the whole thing backfired, and the kids were complaining louder than ever. Samantha had apparently been enraptured by the movies. She’d been sulking after the incident in Club Vanquisher with the “imposter” playing her mother, but the movies had strangely turned her mood around. She’d been zipping around the battalions, providing what she called “moral support” to the soldiers. According to Tipid, that mostly meant sexually harassing them and stealing their alcohol.

“Sure. It’s elegant as...” I paused, realizing what was scrawled on her forehead had finally changed. I sighed.

The “Miss Me?” had been replaced with a new statement. “Fuck the Cheese Dicks.”

“It’s cheese sticks, Samantha. Sticks. Not cheese dicks.”

“I don’t think so, Carl. Cheese sticks doesn’t even make sense. Sticks come from trees. Why would there be a tree made out of cheese? I know one goddess whose clitoris got turned into the head of a bald man named Otis-Ray who spends his day begging to be fed cabbage, so it makes much more sense that a penis would be turned to a food item.”

The conversation was, thankfully, interrupted by Donut.     

Donut: THEY INSTALLED THE WIRELESS PA SPEAKERS IN TIME! ISN’T THAT GREAT?

Carl: The whole system? On all the towers?

Donut: WE BOUGHT THE SYSTEM, AND IT INSTALLED ITSELF. WE GOT THE DELUXE PACKAGE, AND THERE ARE MORE SPEAKERS THAN TOWERS. IT EVEN INTERFACES WITH MY HEADSET, AND I CAN PULL UP ONE OF THOSE RECORDING STUDIO BOARD THINGIES WITH ALL THE SLIDY DIALS. THERE’S SOMETHING CALLED DISTORTION AND DELAY AND REVERB. OOHHH WHAT’S A PHASER? ISN’T THAT FROM STAR TREK?

Carl: Jesus. Get Li Na’s permission before you use it. You’ll blow out the ears of everyone in the 107th.

Donut: I AM A WARLORD. I DON’T ASK PERMISSION. I GIVE ORDERS. BUT I WILL WARN THEM. BUT NOW I CAN ALSO USE BARD SPELLS.

Carl: We’ll save that in case we need it.

Donut: BUT YOU SAID WE NEED TO KEEP THEM DISTRACTED. I COULD TAUNT THEM. I THINK I’M GONNA TAUNT THEM. I HAVE PLENTY OF BALD AND PASTY PEOPLE JOKES READY TO GO. BUT IF YOU THINK THAT MIGHT HURT THE FEELINGS OF SOME OF OUR OWN BALD AND PASTY PEOPLE, I CAN TALK ABOUT HOW LOUIS BASICALLY HAD SEX WITH HIS MOM.

Carl: You have enough to worry about. They’ll be plenty distracted. What you don’t want is unnecessary god attention. You shrieking over a massive PA is just going to work against what we’re trying to do.

Donut: I DON’T SHRIEK, CARL. AND TOYOTOMI SAYS THE DEFLECTOR TOWERS KEEP THE GODS AWAY.

Carl: Think of it like an electric fence. They’re far from foolproof. Remember when Bea’s cousin was making fun of the gorilla at the zoo, and it smashed the glass? Think of it like that.

Donut: OKAY. IMANI IS HERE WITH ME NOW, AND SHE’S SAYING THE SAME THING.

Carl: Good. Listen to her advice. And remember what I said. Aim your shots. Breathe. Make each shot count. You can do this.

Donut: I KNOW I CAN DO THIS, CARL. I AM A WARLORD.   

System Message: 90 Second Warning.

Carl: Okay. Don’t be afraid to jump away at the first sign of trouble.

Carl: Elle. Any sign of Tagg?

Elle: Not yet. Sorry. Edgar is buried and stationed a few miles away and will let us know once if he’s spotted.

Carl: Okay. You be safe. I’ll meet you in the middle.

Elle: Happy hunting, Cowboy.  

I looked up at Louis and nodded. From the cockpit, he gave me a thumbs up. Party Planner silently rose into the night air as Samantha continued to chat away. My stomach lurched as we surged upward, trees, then dark, smoky clouds, then the imaginary, starlit sky whipping by as the airship engaged stealth mode and started to speed toward its target. 

“Ceiling is really high,” Louis called as we continued to rise. “It’s almost three times as high as the bubbles.”

“How do you even know what the ceiling is?” I had to shout.

He tapped his console. “There’s an indicator.”

Through the open doors to my left and right, I couldn’t really see anything below but the dark haze of clouds. Most of the factions had started burning smoke the moment they saw Donut’s tower. It wasn’t going to matter. Donut and Louis both could see right through it all, a skill I didn’t have.  

The ship was so full of armament, there wasn’t enough room to move. My vision was a mass of stability notifications over the dozens of bombs, and I had to dim the notifications to actually see anything if I wasn’t staring out the open side door. The moment I did, I saw the two dots hidden in the back of the ship.

“Goddamnit,” I called, turning around from my spot to see the small gnomish girl peeking around the back pile of the square-shaped No Disassemble bombs. “Skarn and Bonnie! What did I say?” I cursed myself for not paying better attention. Bonnie had a small mouse in her hand. Skarn. 

Carl: Louis, turn it around. We gotta land.

The two kids, one changeling and one gnome, had been explicitly banned from manning the door guns on Party Planner. Especially today.

System Message: Here we go, bitches! Let chaos reign!

“Oh, fuck!” Louis called, and the ship dove. “Get to the guns! Get to the guns! We have incoming! Lots of incoming!”

I cursed as warlord notifications started streaming through my interface. Dozens of distant streaks of light appeared through the cockpit window, emerging up from the clouds like needles pushing up through dark cotton. Missiles. They were fired from Reaver territory. Likely with advanced seekers. They turned and corkscrewed through the air, and despite Party Planner’s stealth capabilities, they headed right toward us. Louis’s cockpit was beeping furiously.

At the same time, the long-range, magical artillery from deep in the Dream territory started to fire. The massive, flaming balls—significantly bigger and more powerful than what they were able to fire during the previous phase—started streaking through the sky, likely split evenly between our headquarters and the Nest tower. Their passage painted the night, like they were tearing a hole through the fabric of darkness.

We were expecting the magical artillery. We had not anticipated the Reaver missiles, especially not ones so smart. They, too, had airships, but we figured if they were going to attack us, they would move straight for the headquarters or hit either Florin or Tran.

“Gotta lower into the trees!” Louis called.

“That won’t stop seekers!” I yelled back, pushing Samantha off me as I tried to stand and reposition myself so I could see better. “Stay above the tree line so we can shoot them down!”

I couldn’t quite stand to my full height and had to keep my head to the side. Bonnie shoved me aside and quickly started unbuckling the large gun from stowage against the interior of the fuselage. Skarn moved to the other side, changing form so he looked like a Chee, like Holger.

Bonnie appeared to be completely calm. She was even chewing gum. The tiny gnome girl was wearing an oversized shirt from someone in the 105th Scream Warriors, and it depicted a crudely drawn bloody berserker character holding an axe. Underneath it was the unit’s motto. “We bleed when the job’s done.”     

“Some of the missiles are exploding,” Louis called. “Why are they exploding?”

“Probably the orc defenses,” I said as I grasped a handhold on the ceiling. I couldn’t see anything anymore as we dove through the clouds and smoke, coming out just above the tree line. The tops of the alien trees whipped by like a treadmill just below us. “The Reavers and the orcs aren’t talking, so maybe they think the missiles are aimed at them. Are we sure they aren’t?”

“They didn’t get all of them!” Louis called, punching buttons. “Looks like three got through. They’re locked on us! Something else is out there, too. Something big. Gonna turn broadside.”

“What? Why?” I called.

Louis ignored me. “Bonnie, they’ll be coming from above but directly in front of you!”

“Got it, boss,” Bonnie called. A helmet appeared on her head. It was a modified gnomish farseer, built around a small-sized, metallic flak helmet. It was so ridiculously large on the small form, it made her look like a bobblehead. “I see ‘em.  All three are bunched up. In range in three, two, one.”  

Jesus, I thought, watching the gnome tracking upward with her gun.   

She fired three short bursts from her weapon, one after another. The clouds above lit with purple, magical light, followed quickly by a wave of heat. “Splash three.”

“Great job, kid!” Louis called. “Resuming mission. Whatever that big thing is, it looks like it’s circling above the Reaper castle.” Party Planner turned in the air.

Samantha was bouncing up and down, shouting encouragement to Bonnie.

“If they can track us, I better keep to the cover,” Louis called. We rose, the dark smoke pushing in on both sides. It suddenly felt oppressive, claustrophobic. Multiple, distant explosions started to echo.

I was already deep in my messages as they flooded in.

Donut: CARL, CARL MY FLAK SPELL WORKS REALLY GOOD! THE STUPID DREAM ELVES ARE ALREADY SHOOTING AT ME, AND THEY DIDN’T EVEN GET CLOSE!  

Elle: Gate one is open, and I’m stepping through. Let’s see what comes out of this one. Next stop, the Reavers. Don’t be late, Carl.  

Warlord Carl: Head’s up, everyone. Feral God number one is on the way.

Tran: Dream artillery is targeting us, not the base! Some of it is getting through! Spreading out and bunkering in.

Oh shit, I thought. If they weren’t targeting the headquarters, that meant...

Tipid: Activated base defense just in time. An entire battalion of Dreamers just teleported outside. They’re making a run for the throne room!

Fuck, fuck, fuck, I thought. The ability to teleport entire battalions at once, as opposed to opening a gate, was near impossible. It required five mages with the same spell to chant for a full thirty hours straight to pull it off. I knew this because we had two groups who’d already done the same, and while the practice wasn’t unheard of, both Rosetta and Mordecai said it’d only happened a handful of times in Faction Wars because of how grueling the process was.

Rosetta: Justice, it’s Dreamers. You want us to let them in?

Justice Light: Chop ‘em up a little first for me, Rosie. Then I will welcome any and all guests into my lair. Would prefer it be Reaver, but I’ll take what I can get.    

Donut: KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR EPITOME TAGG. IF YOU SEE HIM, TELL HIM I’M LOOKING FOR HIM.

Rosetta: I’ll paint him for you if we see him.

A distant, soundless flash momentarily lit the world with a yellow-tinged light.

The Feral God Meatus has entered the realm.

This deity is too distant to activate your Scavenger’s Daughter.  

Mordecai: Oh, fuck.

Rosetta: Yes! Good job, Elle. The Dream have made a tactical error leaving their castle unprotected. They brought their army out too far from home.

Donut: BRITNEY MOVE ON THE ELF CASTLE.

Rosetta: Wait! Don’t use the digger!

Mordecai: No! Hold off. If Meatus is the feral god that escaped the Nothing, that means...

A second, blue-tinged light flashed.

The escaped feral god has summoned a deity!

Harpocrates has made an appearance in the realm!

This deity is too distant to activate your Scavenger’s Daughter.  

Rosetta: Britney, abort! Abort! Tell them not to use the digger near that god!

Tipid: I swear this happens every season.

Britney: Telling them now! Don’t know if it’s too late or not!

Chapter 60

<Note added by Crawler Carl, 25th Edition>

The moment we start the attack on the orcs, the southern assault will also begin. Here are the details of the second of our four simultaneous assaults.  

Objective: Eliminate the Dream

There is no secondary objective. If successful, this attack will completely wipe them off the map.

This attack is being led by Donut in the Nest.

There are three prongs to this attack.

*Prong one is Elle, who has the Gate of the Feral Gods in her inventory. We weren’t originally going to do it this way because of the danger, but it was Justice Light who talked us into it. See my earlier posts on the specifics of how the gate works, but here’s a quick recap.

The gate is three pieces. Two watches and a winding box. Each location in the dungeon is associated with a time on the watch. You dial the location you want to go on one of the watches, stick them in the winding box, and activate it. The box needs to sit there and not move while the watch basically counts down the time difference between where you are and where you want to go. When the time is up, you take the watches out, and a large, one-way portal appears. If you bring the three pieces through the portal, the gate closes immediately behind you, and you are at your destination. Otherwise, the gate stays open for about twenty minutes. The farther the distance, the longer this process takes to complete.

For Elle, hopping across enemy lines with each jump, the timing will be down to minutes.

The moment the gate closes, a monster, usually a feral god, will escape the Nothing at the starting location.

When that god comes through, it’s a true summoning. As a result, it’s not going to time out. The feral god is here to stay. A god from the Ascendency oftentimes—but not always—comes to deal with the escaped god. Luckily, feral gods are not immortal like the regular gods are, but as we know, killing these things is next to impossible.

Elle has hidden herself just outside the Dream’s castle. When the timer expires, she’s going to move from her hiding spot, move a little closer to their big artillery batteries, open a portal, and teleport to just outside the Reaver castle, where she will meet with me and Samantha.

In theory, a feral god will appear and will quickly and efficiently devastate the Dream army and their long-range artillery. It’s a crude plan, but it’s effective. If they’re summoned outside with such a high ceiling, these gods are going to be physically enormous.   

Despite all my posturing and threats, this part of the plan really worries me. We can’t leave this floor until Faction Wars is done, and if we summon too many of these unpredictable feral gods, who will now be stuck in here with us, things might quickly spiral out of control. We have a clean-up plan in place, but it requires the ability to actually communicate with these gods, which is a dubious notion.

In addition, the thing that comes out isn’t always a god. Sometimes it’s a demon, which can be just as bad. We already know if Samantha is near the gate, one of those harem demons sometimes comes out.

Nobody knows if a feral god is stopped by a deflector tower. It has never been tested.   

*Prong two is the digger. It is already in position, and its purpose is to destroy the Dream castle. Their task is actually quite difficult for the reasons I laid out in my earlier post regarding how throne rooms work. The short version is throne rooms act just like the stairwell chamber. They can’t be destroyed. And worse, they can’t be moved, either. So the digger pilots need to work around the fixed stairwell chamber as they make their way through the castle.  

*Prong three is Donut. She will be leading the action from her tower. Her first objective is to find Warlord Tagg from the Dream and kill him the moment she sees him. One of the many great benefits of being an officer is a 9th-floor-only spell called Paint the Target, which will allow other officers to see specific enemies and locations. It times out pretty fast, and it’s considered an offensive skill for some annoying reason, but it’s perfect for our plans. The moment someone sees Tagg, he’s getting, well, tagged.

~

Mordecai: Donut, do NOT use your PA while Harpocrates is out!

Donut: WHY? DOES HE HATE GOOD MUSIC? I JUST FOUND THE PLAY SONG BUTTON ON THE SOUNDBOARD. I HAVE THE PERFECT SONG READY TO GO.

Carl: Goddamnit, Donut. Stick to the plan!   

Mordecai: Harpocrates hates sound. He will come for you if you’re being too loud. Just let him deal with the feral god. This whole Meatus versus Harpocrates thing is an old story, though it’s usually a storyline that plays out during the Ascendency battles. Harpo is going to fight and kill Meatus, and then he’s going to, uh, try to do something with Meatus. But it’s not going to work, which is going to enrage him. Then he’s going to stick around for some time smashing everything noisy until he times out.

Carl: Oh, shit. Are the diggers loud?

Mordecai: They’re dwarven. Everything the dwarves do is loud. Luckily, Meatus is louder.

Donut: OH MY GOODNESS, LOOK AT THAT THING! IT LOOKS LIKE JACK’S PENIS FROM THE SECOND FLOOR! CARL, WHY DO ALL THESE GODS LOOK LIKE PENISES? IS THAT MEATUS OR THE DEAF GUY?

Mordecai: Yeah, uh. That’s Meatus. Meatus is actually two beings, though they only have one name. Originally he was a normal-sized gremlin-like creature who stole Harpocrates’s dink, sewed it on himself, and became a god. It’s an old story and kind of a dumb, reoccurring joke. The gremlin part of Meatus stays the same size no matter where or how he’s summoned, but the dink itself takes on the size that the god would if he was summoned to the same area. That part of him is sapient and very loud and doesn’t want to go back to Harpocrates because it likes music. And Harpocrates isn’t deaf. He is the god of silence, and he can hear the heartbeat of a fly from half a planet away.    

Donut: OMG I LIKE THIS MEATUS GUY ALREADY. BUT DID YOU JUST CALL IT A DINK? IS THAT A CANADIAN TERM? AND HOW IS IT LOUD? I HAVEN’T HEARD ANYTHING...

A massive, slurping noise echoed across the battlefield. It shook the airship as it passed, and it came with the scent of a rotten soft cheese. It sounded like wet sewage getting sucked through a grate.

Next to me, Bonnie started making gagging noises.  

Donut: I CHANGED MY MIND I’M GONNA BARF.

“See, Carl!” Samantha cried from my lap. “See! Cheese dick!”   

“I’m pretty sure that’s the most disgusting thing you’ve ever said.”

More notifications flooded in. Too many to deal with, which was why each attack had their own commander. The orcish defenders had buried armor at the riverbank, and it was now emerging, stalling out Florin, who was responding by flanking them with the Weepers. No sign yet of the mages. The remainder of the Dream army seemed to have abandoned their base and were making a massive push for our throne room, which was bad luck for them. Other than the missiles and whatever was guarding their airspace, there was no sign yet of the Reaver military, nor the Viceroys, who also supposedly had a few war mages on staff.   

“Okay,” Louis said, bringing me back to the now. “Rising again to make the bomb run. Look, there’s the castle!”

He pointed out the cockpit, but all I could see in the darkness was haze and a few lights.

Florin: Head’s up. Some massive, mechanized tank just dug itself out of the riverbank and bloody leaped across the river, falling into our south flank. The thing is like five meters tall. It looks like a scorpion, but it’s the size of one of those industrial haul trucks. It’s covered in shields and it’s about to tear us a new asshole. The thing must weigh 700 tons. Pretty sure it’s being piloted by Warlord Stalwart himself. I think some of the mages might be on that thing, too. It has a deflector tower mounted on it.

Carl: What the hell? Victory said deflectors couldn’t be mobile!

Florin: I’m more worried about why they want one there in the first place. Could just be defensive. I’m calling in missile support. I’m painting it now.  

I moved to the official battle chat, which was an even bigger mess. Missile support was being piloted by Bomo and Sledge. They were based in Shanty Town where they could run to Donut’s aid, but the actual missile batteries they were controlling were mostly fired from Area 52 in the woods. Each battery was controlled via a long-range magical trigger, all tied to a pair of controllers the system called a Trollish Portable Control Room. The controllers looked like 80’s era keyboards with a magical screen above them, and they were fairly common in the dungeon. Supposedly some seasons had gauntlet-style floors where you had to get to a central control room and kill the trolls who were operating the traps.

For Bomo and Sledge, I had a former crawler modify the controllers to mimic the X-Box controllers we’d made for them since they were already familiar with them. Painted targets would appear on the screen, and they could select specific missiles to launch at the targets. We had over 1,500 missiles of various kinds ready to go. I moved to warlord chat.

Warlord Carl: Bomo, Sledge hit Florin’s target with a group of chaffs first, but mix in a few Mute missiles. That thing Florin is describing probably has anti-air capability and is crawling with magic.

Sledge: Already did, boss man.

Carl: Florin, call in the 103rd if you need more support, but try to hold up. They might flee on their own in five minutes. Britney?

Britney: Semeru say they’re on standby waiting for the orc castle shield to get to 50 percent.  

Florin: You assigned me this task because you trust me, mate. Worry about your own assault.

“Bombing now!” Louis called. “Watch your feet!”  

I was so busy with the chat, I hadn’t realized we’d already reached the target. Samantha had gotten herself into the cockpit and was shouting excitedly. The entire cabin lit up as every bomb on board suddenly armed itself.  

“Bombs away!” Louis called, and several spots on the ship’s floor slid open at the same time. Tendrils of freezing mist curled up into the cabin as the airship bucked. Ching, ching, ching, ching. The square No Disassembles clinked as they zipped out of the holders, pulled down by gravity, followed by the round Waffle Makers, which were shaped like tubes. These made a different, heavier sound as they clunked out the holder, disappearing into the mist. The entire load was dropped in seconds.        

“What is that thing?” Bonnie asked, peering out the open door. The gnomish farseer was spinning on her head, trying to zoom in on something I couldn’t see in the darkness. “It’s alive, not an airship.”

“Focus on below. They haven’t reacted yet, but they will,” Skarn called, peering out his side.

Blam, blam, blam! The first bombs hit the invisible shield. Each detonation felt like a slap in my chest. That was followed a second later by even more explosions, and the distinctive thwum of several shields getting cracked open like an egg.

“They’re firing their Flak spells, but it’s not good against gravity bombs,” Louis said. “And I think they taxed their anti-air on the Reaver missiles! Looks like the shield is down way more than... whoa fuck!”

A beam of green light shot up in the air, missing us by about 100 feet as we rocketed away. The light hit the invisible ceiling of the level and crackled, spreading across the barrier just above Party Planner like liquid lightning being poured out upside down. We angled down and away as the dark night suddenly took on a green glow. We disappeared back into the smoke.

“Jesus, I think that was a long-range death ray,” I said.  

“You missed,” Louis shouted, punching the ceiling.

Britney: North attack. Dwarves moving in. Air, confirm you’re clear.

Carl: We’re clear.

Britney: They’re dropping the agitators.  

“Now it’s our turn,” Louis shouted, screaming out the window, still amped up, punching his fist. I’d never seen him like this before.  

“Get them! Get them, Louis!” Samantha shouted, jumping up and down in the cockpit.

Britney: Dwarves confirm the lava tubes have been successfully agitated and the mountain is beginning rapid eruption. They’re setting up barriers and moving out and positioning themselves for lava abatement.

Below and behind us, the mountain upon which the King’s Point castle sat was about to have a very, very bad day. The eruption would be miniscule compared to something like the Mount Saint Helens blast, whose lateral explosion annihilated everything within eight miles, but it would be enough to blow the top off the small mountain and completely obliterate the castle, leaving nothing but a throne room just sitting there in open air.

The eruption itself posed a danger to anyone in the area, and the dwarves supposedly had a plan to rapidly stem the lava flow, keeping it from hitting Larracos. We all held our collective breath.

A shouting voice echoed throughout the land. “NOT THIS TIME. I AM FREE, AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME GO BACK!” This was Meatus, fighting the silent god Harpocrates, all the way on the other side of the map. The deep voice was like that of a big, beefy wrestler trying to shout while gargling messily on something thick. “I YEARN TO SING.”

Donut: THE WEENER GUY JUST SMACKED THE OTHER GOD LIKE A BASEBALL BAT, AND HE WENT FLYING RIGHT INTO THE DREAM CASTLE. IT’S WORKING!

Samantha: THAT REMINDS ME OF MY FIRST TRYST WITH KING BLAINE!

Carl: What about the digger?

Britney: It held off at the last moment. It’s just below the surface, waiting for the gods to move away. The Dream castle’s shields are down, and the remaining staff is starting to flee. Donut, you’re up.

Donut: AND SO IT BEGINS.

“Why is it taking so long for the mountain to explode?” Louis asked.

Britney: Guys, guys, watch out! They added an emergency or backup shield over the whole mountain, and the dwarves are saying too much pressure is...

The mountain behind us blew its top, and we were much too close.

Chapter 61

<Note added by Crawler Carl, 25th Edition>

The third of four offensives is against the Reavers, who appear to be the weakest of the remaining four enemies. It has three prongs.

Objective: Capture the Reaver castle and destroy its army.

Secondary Objective: Possibly capture any Reaver airships if they’re currently grounded. This is unlikely. Alternatively, destroy their airstrips, stopping any air support for any of their allies.

This attack is led by Boomer, but Samantha believes she’s also in charge, and we’re letting her think that.

The Reavers, while formidable, or notoriously slim on magic and prefer to use technological-based defenses. Still, they are the only of our opponents to master the art of anti-teleport nets. Keeping an area free of teleportation, especially over a wide area, takes up a massive amount of resources. As such, most combatants only use it on the castle itself and as an offensive measure, keeping opponents from fleeing. The Reavers, on the other hand, are able to keep anyone from teleporting anywhere near their castle. That’s fine. We are counting on their distance from us, along with their teleportation net, to make them complacent. We are hoping to catch them unawares, even though it will be obvious we are making a huge push.

*Prong one is Samantha. After opening the gate near the Dream, Elle will have teleported far northwest of the Reaver castle, right on the border of the orcs and the Reavers, which is far, far from the edge of their teleportation exclusion zone. Samantha and I will meet up with Elle after getting dropped off by Louis. Elle will re-open the Feral God gate. Elle and I will go through, leaving Samantha behind. We will head for Madness territory for my assault, which is offensive number four.   

We are hoping Samantha’s proximity to the gate will summon another one of those harem demons, like Slit and Minge. As this is still a good ways away from the Reaver castle, Samantha will kite the demon toward the castle, which will hopefully force them to turn their attention northwest when the true attack will be coming from the opposite direction.

If it’s not one of the harem demons, Samantha will still skedaddle from the area, and the summoned god or gods will be pretty distant from most of the action.

If the demon does emerge and engages with Samantha, she will not lead it all the way to the castle unless prong three fails. Assuming prong three is a success, she will continue to allow the demon to chase her across the battlefield, waiting for orders on where to lead it.

Honestly, I don’t really expect this whole part to work out that well, but Samantha has surprised me before. And in a day filled with chaos, a single-minded demon might not be a bad asset to have, assuming it doesn’t actually catch Samantha, who has been able to quickly fly ever since the incident at Club Vanquisher. In fact, she’s faster now than I’ve ever seen her.   

*Prong two is Louis, who will quickly hit Area 52, reload, and return with a second load. This will be a few Waffle Makers, several anti-troop Cheese Slicers, and a large complement of No Disassembles. He will hit the castle and any gathered defenders. He will also be carrying four air-to-air missile tubes. His bomb run will be preceded by a barrage from Bomo and Sledge.

*Prong three is Boomer, leading the 106th Bloody Leeches along with half of the 103rd Recon Legionnaires and a battalion of Team Retribution regulars, who specialize in air defense should the Reavers have an air-based defender. They will emerge from the tunnels, pre-built by Team Retribution and widened during the previous phase. They will enter the tunnels from Larracos itself and will immediately book it the thirty kilometers, using tracked carts. They will emerge from two locations just outside the castle and will conduct a direct assault to capture the throne room immediately after Louis’s bombardment.    

We do not know the location of Warlord Fang, but he is usually in the throne room itself. Boomer’s team is equipped and trained to fight Reavers directly, and assuming they can get through the tunnels safely—which I am worried about—I am confident they will succeed in either killing Fang or taking and holding the throne room quickly once they emerge.

The Reavers are known for their air capabilities, and I have voiced my concern we haven’t properly prepared for their defenses. Juice Box told me directly her troops are trained to deal with any aerial threats. That’s not going to help Louis if they’re not out and set up until after his bomb run. All he’ll have is his anti-air missiles, our own long-range missiles, and support from Donut, whose hands—paws—will already be full. I’ve asked Prepotente, who will also be airborne, to keep an eye out, though he will be occupied as well, assisting me with the most difficult and dangerous of the four assaults.

I am terrified I’m sending Louis to his death with this attack. I pray I am wrong.

~

The mountain exploded, and suddenly, we were spinning, cartwheeling through the air. I smashed to the ceiling of Party Planner and crashed back down as we twirled like we’d been flicked away.

“Hold on!” Louis shouted as we spun. The vertical spin corrected, but we still spun like a top, and we were actually going up, not down. To my right, Skarn had changed to an octopus-like creature, and he had five or six arms wrapped around a screaming Bonnie, keeping them both in the cabin. One of Bonnie’s small arms was clearly broken, but it healed as I watched.

A terrible, screeching noise filled the air as the airship’s propellor’s bounced off the floor’s ceiling. One of them broke off and tumbled away, smoking as the ship finally corrected itself. From the cockpit, Louis was cursing loudly, but we didn’t fall. I remembered he’d said we could still fly with as little as two propellors.  

I was going to vomit, but I jumped into my chat as I heaved. Rocks started pinging off the airship’s shield.

Warlord Carl: Florin and everyone in the 101st! Brace for a shockwave! Eruption is bigger than they said it would be! Elle, you too. Buckle down. Boomer, watch your heads. If that tunnel starts to collapse, evacuate early.

“You guys okay?” I shouted at Skarn, who’d turned back to his chee shape.

“We’re good,” Bonnie said. She actually seemed okay, but I could see the fear in Skarn’s eyes. Tears had formed.

Crack! That was a new sound, and it took a moment for me to realize what it was. It was Donut casting Magic Missile. With her tiara’s advanced targeting skills and Donut’s elevated position, along with her Deathbed Hellcat class, she could hit anything she could see with any of her long-range spells. It was louder than expected.

When we built the Nest tower, we could assign the tower’s synergy to several different skills, spells, and classes. Originally, we planned on making it a straight-up sniper tower, which would greatly enhance Donut’s ability to zero in on a target across the battlefield. But it turned out with her tiara, that was unnecessary. All Donut needed was line of sight to apply her sniper skills.

Which, in turn, allowed us to assign a different synergy to the tower.

The Nest was instead built to have synergy with something called Atrocity-class spells.

Donut had several, including her new one. War Crime.  

It was the one part of today’s plan I prayed we wouldn’t have to use.

A dark plume of ash was starting to spread that was going to be a problem for everyone. And the lava flow would probably be more than the dwarves had anticipated, too.

“Carl!” Louis shouted as more rocks fell all around us. “I can fly with three props, but not well. I can quick repair it at base, but I gotta limp back through this chop. You guys better jump now. I see Elle’s beacon.”

“Okay!” I said. I turned to the kids. “When you get back to base, stay there this time. Do you understand?”

Skarn nodded, not saying anything.

Still, I grabbed him by the shoulder and leaned in. “Don’t just stay at Area 52. Get back into the saferoom. And if you have any friends that aren’t allowed in the saferoom, make sure they’re in Larracos. Not Shanty Town. Larracos. Do you understand?”

He nodded again, and this time I believed him.  

Carl: Elle, you good?

Elle: Oh, you know. The winding box got knocked over and the watches fell out. The gate was already primed, so the gate activated. Hurry your ass up. But I’m okay. A bunch of trees cracked but didn’t fall. Who could’ve predicted activating a goddamned volcano could possibly spiral out of control? And just you wait. I went through this back in ’80. We’re all gonna be cleaning ash out of all our crevices for the next 99 years.

“Come on, Samantha!” I called. I looked for the large portal, but I couldn’t see anything in the smoke.

Crack! Crack!

“Bye, Louis!” Samantha said. She zipped up and kissed him on the cheek. “Kill them all for me!” She came to hover near me. Her hair was already ruined, and the “Fuck the Cheese Dicks” had smeared. Now all it said was “Fuck Cheese.”

Donut: HEADSHOT!

I had fall protection, but I still didn’t trust it. I took a scroll of Controlled Feather Fall and read it.

“Stay safe!” I called at Louis before I activated my tech shield and jumped out the open door, followed soon by Samantha. Party Planner quickly disappeared above us as it angled around, heading back toward Area 52.  

As we fell, plunging through the smoke and rocks, some of which burned red-hot, multiple notifications came in quick succession.

The battlefield conditions have triggered a summoning! The God of Chaos has been spontaneously summoned.

Yarilo has made an appearance in the realm.

This deity is too distant to activate your Scavenger’s Daughter.  

System Message: A demon eviction event is occurring over multiple locations on the battlefield.  

Florin: We got a demon event starting here. Missiles disabled the enemy armor’s movement but not its teeth. Missiles, hit it again. Looks like Stalwart tried to teleport away, but the net stopped him. He might make a run for it. Donut, looks like we might need an atrocity or two in a minute.

Donut: SAY THE WORD, AND DEATH WILL RAIN IN MY NAME.   

Before I could even parse all that, more notifications came.

The Throne Room of the Bone Clan is being occupied by forces from Team Retribution. If they can hold for three hours, the Bone Clan will be defeated!

The Throne Room of the Dream is being occupied by forces from Team Retribution. If they can hold for three hours, the Dream will be defeated!

Warlord Message. Sir Ferdinand of Team Retribution has proposed an emergency action item. “Gods that appear during Faction Wars don’t gotta go home right away. Uh, Juice Box told me to say a bunch of other stuff too but now I can’t remember it all. Something about outworlders, but you probably heard what she said. But she wanted me to also say that she promises it’ll be entertaining. So my proposal is that.”

This emergency action item request has been split into two requests. The first action item has been denied. All deity summoning rules will remain in effect as written for the ninth floor.

The second action item has been approved. Effective immediately, the following ascendency rules are applied. Ascendency players may no longer choose whether to pilot their sponsored deities should they be summoned off the 12th floor. Attendance is now mandatory. In addition, during gameplay summons, ascendency players may no longer choose to appear as themselves. All deities will appear as designed, and all sponsored deities will be piloted by their sponsors. Any summons currently in progress where the pilot stayed back because he was being a cowardly little bitch have been corrected.     

“What the fuck,” I said out loud as I narrowly missed slamming into a tree. I slowed my descent and landed hard in the woods, Samantha floating next to me. All around me, trees that still stood were starting to burn.

None of that was planned. Not the gods. Not Team Retribution getting to those two throne rooms, and especially not that action item. I looked frantically on my map, and I saw a single dot about two hundred meters away with the already-activated portal right next to her. She was waiting for me to get there. We would go through the gate and teleport ourselves to the Madness, leaving Samantha behind.  

Elle: Jesus, Carl. You landed like a comet. I see you. Better get here quick. I just got a weird notification that someone had searched my location.

Victory cracked into existence right next to me.

This was already so far off the rails, I didn’t even startle at Victory’s appearance.

Fire from the eruption continued to rain down. Victory said nothing. She just looked down at me, arms crossed, a grim look on her face. I was about to say something snarky, but she held up her hand.

“Just so you know, we only learned about this like five minutes ago,” she said. “None of the adjutants had any idea. We tried to stop it, but apparently the AI says it’s out of its hands.”

“What are you talking about?”

Florin: Damnit! The anti-teleport net was breeched. Stalwart teleported away!

Donut: I SAW HIM! DID I GET HIM?

Florin: I think you might’ve winged him just as he was teleporting, but I couldn’t tell what was happening. He popped out the top of the tank covered with something.

Donut: HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS FIGHTING HIS OWN GUYS!  

Several dots suddenly appeared on the map, all enemies. They’d all teleported right to Elle’s location and the portal.

Elle: Carl! Stalwart is here!  

I ran toward the commotion, preparing to use my Wraith Phase. As I rushed forward, Elle flew past me, flying over my shoulder, having been tossed by a spell. I saw the Unconscious tag over her head. She hit a tree behind me with a sickening crack, and the tree toppled over.

“Samantha,” I cried as I rushed forward. “Help her!”

I jumped into the clearing, quickly taking in the scene, confusion mounting. What the hell? Stalwart was here, on his knees, crying in pain. There were four corpses on the ground. War mages. The magical beings were dead and smoking. They’d been hit with Donut’s Magic Missile before they’d all teleported here. Three more of the war mages surrounded Stalwart, shouting. A fourth stood off to the side.

Quickly-melting ice covered everything. Elle had managed a spell before she’d been taken out.  

Even though they were all the same type of creature, they all looked like different monsters. They all had crackling, multi-hued glows around them. I knew more about war mages now than I had before the floor started, and the sight of so many in one place terrified me.

The one standing off to the side had the mark of colonel over his head, but as I watched, the designation faded away. And much to my surprise, their dots all turned white.

I examined the war mage. He looked much like the one whose head I had in my inventory. A long-haired elf, old and wizened with an angry sneer on his sagging face.    

Akuma. War Mage. Level 100.  

This was originally a high-elf cobbler with a human skin, resleeved-12 times before the ambient magic gave him his final form. He’s arguably the most powerful non-god magic caster on this floor. He’s also a complete prick, as evidenced by the company he keeps.  

Want to know some interesting trivia about war mages? These guys have been around since the very early days of Dungeon Crawler World, but they are one of the few, true dungeon-born entities. They weren’t dreamed up by a sweaty, caffeine-addled writer, nor were they developed by one of my kind. They just sort of happened, a result of too many combatants having access to You’re Not Done Yet.

The final form a war mage takes is entirely dependent on the combination of its first two forms, in this case, a human crawler from a very long time ago and a high elf. The skin of a corpse is ripped off of a body and turned to a creature named a flesher. The flesher then consumes a living being, melting the original skin off and re-sleeving the creature. The flesher casts Boned, reanimating the skeleton, and the two become a symbiote.

Symbiotes are extremely attractive targets to other fleshers. And because young symbiotes are slow and awkward, they are oftentimes quickly re-sleeved by fresh fleshers. Each iteration results in a more powerful being.

It’s rare for a symbiote to be resleeved 12 times, but when it happens, the magic itself becomes sapient, and the flesh finally fuses to the reanimated skeleton, turning the three creatures—the skeleton, the flesher, and the sapient well of magic—into a single being. A war mage.

War mages come with knowledge of hundreds of spells.

If these things were noncorporeal, they’d be called magic elementals. Instead, they’re just grumpy, lumpy assholes who get their rocks off by showing just how cruel they can be. The very nature of most magic spells is cold cruelty, and that shows when the magic itself is allowed to talk.  

And nobody made them! All of this just happened on its own. In fact, the very existence of these things has actually been the focus of multiple, boring-ass studies and books. But, in the end, because they were “born” in the dungeon, they are of the dungeon, and just because nobody engineered their existence doesn’t mean that existence hasn’t been exploited, as evidenced by the fact most war mages find their minds wiped and themselves sitting in quests or mercenary guilds each time a new dungeon opens.

However, their very existence also creates problems. Each war mage one may come across in the dungeon was created naturally, meaning they could have been made several seasons previous, and because the showrunners like to use war mages, especially for their precious Faction Wars, they are rarely recycled.

And if you can’t see why that’s not a problem for all you assholes reading this, maybe you should ask that pissed-off, changeling army that’s in the middle of wrecking your shit why you should’ve planned better.

Oh, by the way. Their heads explode and create something called a Sapient Moment of Destruction approximately ten minutes after they die. So, head’s up. Pun intended.     

As I watched in horror, the three war mages surrounding Stalwart each chanted something in unison, and the orc’s flesh began to tear.

I met eyes with the terrified orc for just a moment.

“My sister was right,” King Stalwart, leader of the Skull Empire, said in the moment before he exploded right in front of me, showering the clearing with his gore.

He’d been killed by his own mercenaries.  

The four mages didn’t move to attack me.  

For the first time, I saw what was in Akuma, the leader’s hands. 

He had taken the Gate of the Feral Gods from Elle. The war mage was staring at my bare feet.

“Nice shoes, asshole,” he said to me before the four of them teleported away.

~~~~~

Howdy all. This all could really benefit from maps, and I plan on having a map accompanying each of the four plans even though it's going to become increasingly clear with each chapter that the plans have already gone to shit. I didn't want to make you guys wait longer though I have much more written.

It's 100% chaos from here on out.

**

Here is my tentative DragonCon schedule. I'll make a fancy graphic later, but I am posting now so I don't lose this.

In addition to what's listed here, I will have a signing at the Eagle Eye bookshop in Decatur on Wednesday the 28th before DC starts. Details forthcoming.

I will also be signing books on-site at 1 PM on Saturday at the Missing Volume's booth in the main vendor hall. Glennis at the Missing Volume has been kind enough to stock the new DCC hardcovers on my behalf, and that will be the only official place selling books at the show (she will also be at the signing showcase thing I THINK). The new DCC edition of book 1 comes out August 27th, so this will be your first opportunity to get it if you can't make the Wednesday event.

Of special note is the Sunday 7 PM LITRPG RAID PARTY EXTRAVAGANZA. That is this year's version of the aquarium party we did last year, and it's going to be a massive party and a veritable who's who of the LitRPG community followed immediately by Dungeon and Dragons live.

Jeff will do a reading at the DCC discussion panel on Saturday at 4 pm. I may have him read from Backstage at the Pineapple Cabaret.

(I'll also be at the Fantasy Gather on Friday(?) night mingling)

Anyway, schedule:

Title: What's up with Penguin Books?

Description: Get the dish on exciting recent releases and upcoming fantasy, science fiction, and horror novels. You can expect the chance to win FREE books and advance reading copies, lame jokes, and a truly epic PowerPoint presentation.

Panelists: Anne Sowards(M), Jessica Wade(M), James J. Butcher(O), Jim Butcher(O), Jack Campbell(O), Matt Dinniman(O), Kim Harrison(O)

Time: Fri 01:00 pm

Location: International South Hyatt (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: LitRPG World Building: Writer's Discussion

Description: Building a LitRPG world involves creating a fictional universe where characters interact with the world in a way that resembles a role-playing game. Our writers discuss techniques on their detailed creative journeys; revealing the intricate dynamics of where these fan-favorite stories take place.

Panelists: Robert Royl(M), Matt Dinniman, Tao Wong, K.T. Hanna, Jay Boyce, James A. Hunter

Time: Fri 04:00 pm

Location: Chastain F-G Westin (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: Signing Showcase: Apocalypse Rising Track: LitRPG World Building

Description:

Panelists: Jay Boyce, Matt Dinniman, K.T. Hanna, Tao Wong, James A. Hunter

Time: Fri 05:30 pm

Location: Overlook Westin (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: What Makes LitRPG So Popular

Description: LitRPG has been going full speed ahead for a while now. What makes it so popular, what pulls so many people in to it?

Panelists: James A. Hunter, K.T. Hanna, Matt Dinniman, Dakota Krout(M), Tao Wong, Jaime Castle

Time: Sat 11:30 am

Location: Embassy AB Hyatt (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: Dungeon Crawler Carl: Discussion with Matt Dinniman

Description: Tap into the mind of LitRPG author, Matt Dinniman, the creative force behind "Dungeon Crawler Carl". With his compelling protagonist, immersive world-building, and clever humor, it's no wonder that the book has garnered a dedicated following and become a standout title in this sensational genre.

Panelists: Robert Royl(M), Matt Dinniman, Jeff Hays, Emily Labes-Royce

Time: Sat 04:00 pm

Location: Chastain F-G Westin (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: Who Told the Characters They Could Do That?

Description: Are your characters driving the action in your books/stories? Should they be? Who's the boss here anyway?

Panelists: Nancy Knight(M), Matt Dinniman, J.D. Blackrose, Stacey Rourke, S. L. Rowland, Tamsin L. Silver

Time: Sun 02:30 pm

Location: Embassy EF Hyatt (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: Dungeons, Dragons and High Fantasy

Description: Fifty years ago the gaming table was inspired by High Fantasy. Now authors who grew up playing Dungeons and Dragons are the ones taking inspiration.

Panelists: John G. Hartness(M), Jay Boyce, Michael Chatfield, Matt Dinniman, Brianna Marie

Time: Sun 05:30 pm

Location: L401-L403 Marriott (Length: 1 Hour)

Title: LitRPG: Ultimate Raid Party Extravaganza

Description: Join us for an evening of LitRPG as we host narrators and authors alike for a one of a kind event. We will have some great prizes and secret quests for those who wish to play.

Panelists: Matt Dinniman, Shirtaloon, James A. Hunter, Dakota Krout, Jay Boyce, Cyn (Cyn's Corner & Soundbooth Theater)

Time: Sun 07:00 pm

Location: International North-South Hyatt (Length: 2.5 Hours)

Title: Dungeons and Dragons Live!!!!!!

Description: Dragon Con presents a live game of Dungeons and Dragons involving some of our guests and the winner of the auction for a seat at the game. (All proceeds go to charity.) John Hartness is the DM and it promises to be fun and entertaining.

Panelists: John G. Hartness(M), Matt Dinniman, R.R. Virdi, Sarah J. Sover, Lucienne Diver

Time: Sun 10:00 pm

Location: Regency V Hyatt (Length: 2.5 Hours)