Chapter 530 (Patreon)

Funny enough, they made no visible movements towards me. They were like deers staring into a car’s headlights with how they sort of froze.

How surprising, it seems like actual consequences may actually stop them from acting like dicks.

Come on, don’t be shy. Invade a foreign country, private land, and cause an international incident while it’s caught on camera.

It’s not like you haven't done it before.

Come on, where did that boldness go?

If Kunou wasn’t calling me, I wouldn’t have just kept it to myself.

Despite weapons being pointed at me, they remained utterly silent, staring at me and I chose to stop caring for the moment.

Smiling bright, I answered the call. “My little fox.”

“Daddy!” Her voice came from the other end.

I admit, it hit me in a way I didn’t expect to hear her voice after so long. “I’ve missed you, sweetheart.”

“I missed you too, daddy.” I could hear the warmness in her voice and it gave me the warm fuzzies.

“So, how’d you convince your Aunt Medea to let you use her phone?” I asked humorously. There was a reason we didn’t want Kunou to have a Kaleidophone herself. We didn’t want it to be a crutch that held her back. She needed to spread her wings, make friends, and learn to be a bit self sufficient. Of course she could go to Medea here and there to call us when needed. 

So if she got hold of Medea’s phone, then Medea probably felt like it was fine.

“I shared my snacks with her.” She said proudly.

“Is that so?” Did Medea extort sweets from her or could she not withstand Kunou’s cuteness when trying to get the phone? Either way, I paused briefly to pick up a rock and throw it across the air. With a ‘thud’ it hit an invisible person who was about to step over the border. I gave them a rather annoyed glare and continued with my call as they remained completely still and silent. 

Did they think that was going to work when I so blatantly told them last time that I could see their invisible guys?

Well, technically, I couldn’t see him this time since I wasn’t wearing those Glasses, but I could sense him and I could pick up on his movements.

“Where’s Momma?” She asked as I did my best to ignore their returned glares, turning my back to them, though that probably just pissed them off even more.

“She’s somewhere that can’t receive calls right now. I’ll make sure she knows you called an we can set up something so you can talk to her as soon as possible.” I did feel bad that Yasaka missed Kunou’s first call ‘home’. “Tell me about school, how have you been doing? Make any n ew friends, learn any fun things?”

“I made friends!” She quickly said as if to defend herself. “I even have a best friend now.”

Oh my heart, it’s too cute.

“And whats their name?”

“Luna Lovegood.”

“Ah, I believe we met her before.” I recalled the…..interesting girl. “She seemed nice.”

“She’s really nice! And she’s fun and she doesn’t care that I’m not human.” She started listing off a lot of things and I patiently let her babble along. “And I learned how to make a light on my wand, and I learned how to turn stuff into a mouse. Oh Daddy, I learned how to fly on a broom too!”

You know, it’s funny how easy all my current annoyance just bled away while she talked. 

“Did you use Grandpa’s broom?”

“Yeah, I went really high and fast!” She exclaimed. “It was scary, but fun and….they won’t let me use it anymore.”

I nearly choked on the last part. Dammit Gramps, what did you do? “I’m sure, they have a good reason for it. Even Medea?”

“Aunt Medea said it’s going away with my spear.” 

I couldn’t see her face right at this moment, but I could probably guess that her ears flattened sadly.

“....you got your spear taken too?”

“I fought a big squid.” Was her reply.

“Thats my girl.” I have absolutely no context for what happened, but I’m proud of her.

“Luna helped me too!” 

“Sounds like she’s a good friend.” If she willingly fought a giant squid along with Kunou like she said, well, that’s a friend for life.

“How about everyone else, no one treating you badly?” I would hate to have to go over there and pay some people a visit. I told myself I wouldn’t but dad instincts are surprisingly irrational as I have been learning since she came into my life.

“Mmm, some others tried to bully me.”

I assume ‘tried’ being the operative word here. “And how’d you handle it?”

“I punched him in the throat.”

“That’s my girl.” I said again, feeling an intense sense of pride overwhelming me. “What about –”

“You brat, I knew it was you!” Medea’s distinct voice was heard in the background from Kunou’s end. 

“I gotta go, love you daddy, bye!” She quickly blurted out in one breath and what followed sounded like the phone hitting the ground and bouncing a few times.

…what happened?

“Oi, brat I assume that’s you on the other end?” Medea’s voice was much more clear now as she was directly talking with the phone to her head.

“Hello, Medea. Kunou not giving you any trouble I hope?”

She let out a huff. “I don’t know if I should strangle her or praise her.”

“...what did she do?”

“I didn’t willingly give her my phone.” There seemed to be a begrudging respect in her tone. 

“She said that she shared some snacks and that’s how she got it.”

“Is that what she said?” Medea seemed to be seething on the other end. “Oh, she certainly shared them with me alright. I’ll be needing to wash out my hair with how much she shared with me.”

“What happened?”

“Her and her little group of friends started a food fight at dinner time. I happened to be on my phone at the time sending a message to Atalanta. In the midst of the chaos, I set it down on the table to help with the chaos. Next thing I know, half the room starts targeting me specifically, led by her friends while she swoops in behind me and steals my phone right from my table!”

I did my best not to laugh.

I really wanted to laugh, but I didn’t.

“She should be punished appropriately.”

“How hard was it for you to actually say that out loud?” She said dryly.

“I think I may have drawn blood from how hard I was biting my lips.” I admitted.

“I hate you. Your daughter is a hellspawn.”

“Technically true. And you love her.”

“Ugh, you’re right.” She grumbled. “I’m going to give her a spanking though.”

“Have fun.” 

She was quick to hang up and I didn’t blame her.

Regardless, I was just happy to hear from Kunou.

I put my own Kaleidophone away and turned back at the people glaring into my back. “Holy shit are you guys still there? You just sat there this entire time while I was on the phone? That’s fucking weird.” 

I think the leader of them twitched slightly.

“Where were we again? Oh right. Cameras recording you while you break international law and cause international incidents. Proceed.” I gestured to him.

They didn’t move.

Hmm, I forgot I was wearing my ruined hat. 

A bit of my anger returned when I glanced upwards and saw it again.

It was a really nice hat.

“What do you want?” W’Kabi finally broke the silence of his side.

“Pardon?” I looked at him. “What do I want? I think that’s fairly clear. I never made any effort to hide it.”

“You intend to blackmail us to acquire Vibranium, is that it?” He clenched his teeth.

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. “Get over yourself.”

“....what?” He blinked, seemingly confused by my reply.

“Get.Over.Yourself.” I repeated, slowly. “I’m not going to blackmail you stupid fucks. Do you guys think that Vibranium doesn’t exist anywhere else in the world? This was just the easiest route to get some, I’ll go fish some up later. Bunch of idiots that think they’re more important than they really are. Here’s a bit of news for you, plenty of people are aware of your little….society.” I saw his eyes flash with surprise. Did they really think that no one else in the world knew about their secret? “The thing is, no one cares. You’re not important. There are plenty of secret groups that are much more secret than you guys and they don’t just start shooting people when they think their secret is revealed.” I shook my head.

You know, it’s funny. With how long it took me to set everything up, the sheer amount of effort….well, I could have probably already found vibranium and been on my way.

However….fuck them.

I get enough of the superiority complexes from literal gods, I don’t need to put up with it from a bunch of people I could slap into the moon.

W’Kabi seemed genuinely confused by my reply, it didn’t look like he had a proper response. In fact, all the guys pointing weapons at me were rather….lost.

I imagine they’re used to being so in control that when something like this happens, they don’t have experience on how to respond.

“Anyways, I’m about done here. Of course, I can’t leave you all without a farewell gift.” I held my hands up and they seemed to stiffen. A moment or two passed as nothing happened. “Sorry, give it a moment, it’s not a precise thing.”

The giant penis behind me trembled.

Now, if someone asked me ‘Wilhelm, did you install a series of pipes and a pneumatic air compressed with a liquid container attached to a sliding chamber mechanism.’ I would say, do you even know me?

With a shake, the big penis erupted with a geyser of water from the tip.

I held my hands up as the release of water was big enough that it got all of us wet.

Followed quickly, the other structures erupted too. We could both hear and see them in the distance, progressively getting further down the border. Faint explosive sounds reverberating in the distance as they were no longer visible from our spot.

A fortune spent buying and bribing my way to ownership and citizenship. Days spent simply meeting the required people and filling out paper work.  Hours more spent erecting the structures around my new lands.

Was it worth it?

No regerts.

I met the eyes of W’Kabi and ran my fingers along the rim of my ruined hat, flicking away the water dripping down before turning and leaving.

@***@

T’Chaka, King of Wakanda POV

“Enter.” I commanded.

“My king.” W’Kabi kneeled. “And council members.” He greeted the others as well.

“W’Kabi, you’re also a member of the council, you need not show this level of difference among us.” I said lightly.

“I am here to report as a member of the Border Tribe and one who was personally involved in the incident, my king. I do not wish to use my status as a Council Member to sway any thoughts about my failures.” He replied with sincerity.

“If that is your desire.” I would not argue with him and challenge his pride. “As per traditions, I will announce two sit-ins on this Council Meeting. For matters of rulership my son is present.” I gestured to T’challa. “And my daughter is present for her expertise.” I gestured to Shuri. Proper etiquette is important even amongst friends when it comes to situations like this.“We’ve all seen the recordings of the incident. Please start from the beginning and give your thoughts.”

W’Kabi stood up and began. “Roughly five days ago, a foreigner approached our borders and our scouts were alerted to his presence, quickly contacting the tribe for more assistance. As is normal, a handful of our tribesmen were dispatched in appropriate disguise and made contact with the foreigner. He expressed desire to purchase Vibranium.”

No one made a move to interrupt him and after a few moments, he continued.

“We did as we always do when outsiders come to ‘acquire’ our Vibranium. It was a standard incident until the outsider made comments about knowledge he should not possess. He stated outright that he is aware of the full extent of the Vibranium we possess and he claimed to be able to see the great shield that protects the golden city. Our Tribesman, startled by the admittance, proceeded to try and apprehend him but were met with an inexplicable weight and they lost consciousness.”

I turned to Shuri, knowing it was her turn.

“He said he could see the shield?” She asked.

“That is the statement that my tribesman relayed. He also made note that he could see through the invisibility of our stealth technology.” W’Kabi responded.

Shuri furrowed her brows. “That shouldn’t be possible. I’ve been keeping up with the tech on the outside world and nowhere should be even close to capable of that. Our Stealth tech takes into account infrared, heat, sound –”

I held my hand up as everyone got the point. “Continue, W’Kabi.”

“To our surprise, the outsider did not further harm our tribesman, nor did he steal any of their vibranium equipment after they revealed some of our technology.”

I nodded, knowing this part more completely than the newest incident. “This was reported and I ordered a more aggressive patrolling of the border the follow days as a deterrent.”

“If I may, father.” T’Challa stepped forward.

“Speak, son.”

“There has been one person who successfully infiltrated Wakanda and stolen from us. Is it possible that this new outsider is working together with him?”

I took a deep breath to steady my mind at his mention. “W’Kabi.”

“My Prince, we have shared a similar sentiment. However…..” He clenched his jaw for a moment. “Ulysses Klaus is a vile man. He would not have left my tribesman alive, nor would he have left their Vibranium equipment when it was infront of him for the taking.”

“Perhaps this is all the result of a misunderstanding.” My wife spoke a voice of reason.

“Perhaps.” I acknowledged the chance. “However, there are now things we cannot overlook. Continue, W’Kabi.”

“The second incident occurred roughly three days later. We were alerted to certain…..structures raised across the border we share with Nigeria. These….structures –”

“W’Kabi.” My wife interrupted.

“Yes, my queen?”

“We all know what a male penis is, you don’t need to dance around the subject, and we’ve seen the pictures.”

There were a few twitches of faces as some people in the room had to stop themself from smiling. 

W’Kabi let out a sigh. “The outsider seemed to have erected forty foot tall phalluses across the border, to an extent. We discovered him before the border would be completely covered and moved to apprehend. I personally took charge this time and attempted to be gentle in our efforts.”

“And despite the…absurdity, no one was harmed Is that right?” My wife asked.

“That’s right, my Queen. Apart from wishing to settle matters without bloodshed, I believed it an opportunity to acquire information. As the outsider revealed knowledge he should not have, I took the most optimal approach at the time.”

“Your judgement serves you well, W’Kabi.” My wife praised him and I nodded along.

“I agree, W’Kabi.” I said expressing my opinion despite his own reluctance to accept his innocence in the matter. “Please continue.”

“The outsider revealed that he was recording us in hopes I believed at the time to use to strongarm Vibranium from us.”

Shuri scoffed. “I hope you weren’t slowed down by their primitive technology.”

“I made sure to disrupt any devices in the area. It was moments later that he received a phone call and answered right infront of us.”

“.....you used my invention, right?” Shuri asked.

“Yes, Princess.” W’Kabi answered.

“Impossible, it should have shut off all methods of communication that don’t utilize Vibranium.” She quickly asserted.

“I assume this is where your hesitation came from W’Kabi?” I asked, looking at him.

“Yes, My king. I was unsure of how to proceed.”

I closed my eyes and internally sighed. “T’Challa, what are your thoughts?”

My son seemed to ponder the question. “I do not believe there was any correct answer. I have read over the report as well, and I do not know what actions I would take in your spot. Do you move aggressively and it is revealed that we have crossed borders to apprehend a man who claims to have acquired citizenship in the lands we trespass? Do we use our advance technology and also reveal ourselves to be more than a simple country of farmers? In the face of uncertainty, you retained the dignity and secrecy of Wakanda as best as you could.”

“Well spoken, son.” I nodded in approval. It was perhaps best that  W’Kabi hear the words from someone other than myself. “However, the matter of the outsider’s parting words is what leaves us with the most concern.”

A more tense feeling descended upon the room, and I believe everyone could feel it.

“The outsider revealed that many know of our existence.” W’Kabi stated.

“Allegedly.” Shuri spoke up. It wasn’t her position, but as Princess, she did have some allowances. And she did speak with wisdom.

“Allegedly.” My wife repeated. “There are others in the world who also hide that we know nothing about, but they know about us.”

No one spoke as her words set in. 

“It is not something we can hope is a lie.” I finally opened my mouth to speak. “For the sake of Wakanda.”

It was no exaggeration to say that the future of Wakanda depended on what we did next. To find out that there are many out there that are aware of our secrets, yet we do not know who they are? 

It was….humbling, in a way.

How long have we looked down upon the outside world, yet there are supposedly those who look down upon us the same.

“We must find this outsider.” T’challa stated firmly. “Find out what they know and prepare ourselves for the possibility.”

“He spoke about his intentions to acquire Vibranium from alternative sources” W’Kabi added.

Yes, and how unpleasant it is that the thought of an outsider acquiring Vibranium from a source we were unaware of is one of the lesser concerns for us?

“Didn’t he say that he was going to ‘fish it up?” Shuri interjected. “How likely was that not a metaphor?”

We exchanged looks and considered the possibility.

Devices to detect vibranium were not unheard of. There were very few sources of vibranium we could detect across the world as we had secretly taken them all over the course of a millennium. The exceptions being the stock of vibranium that klaus had stolen as he seemingly knew how to shield it from various source of detection. 

However, one part of this that has alluded us all this time was that we couldn’t utilize such devices to discover any sources of vibranium in the ocean.

The clash of the tides and movement of the waters disrupts the devices attempts to locate it based on certain frequencies.

Maybe….this outsider does have a way to find vibranium in the waters?

If so, we need to quickly find him before he amounts any meaningful source.

“This…..Wilhelm Henry Schweinorg.” I recalled the name we had been given from the identification retrieved. “I will authorize the deployment of our military. Capture is our priority, however…..you will have permission to eliminate him if needed.”

For the sake of Wakanda, we would eliminate any threats.

“We should probably clear those eyesores around our borders as well.” My Wife spoke up.

Ah yes. “W’kabi, have your tribesmen start dismantling those. We don’t need to draw any extra attention to ourselves at this time.”

“Reporting, my King. I have already sent my Tribesmen to destroy them, but we have run into difficulties.” 

“Difficulties?” I repeated. “What difficulties?”

“Any attempts to destroy the structures have failed. Wooden pieces won’t break, clear shots from a distance seemingly miss without reason. And sometimes when we get close, it’s as if we can’t find it even if we’re standing right infront.” He paused for amoment. “And….”

“And?”

“.....whenever we get close to any of them…..they erupt.”

“.......”

I rubbed the bridge of my nose and let out a sigh. I do not know who this Wilhelm is, but my dislike for him has reached a level I thought impossible for someone who had never killed any of my people before. “I am going to say this once and as King, it will never be repeated out of this context again. Shuri, please go assist W’Kabi in handling the giant penises across our border.”

@***@

A/N

Sorry for the delay, but my computer crashed and I lost the chapter earlier. If that sounds familiar, it’s because this is probably the fifth time this situation has happened to me. However, this particular time is unique because my brand new computer blue screened as I was wrapping up. It blue screened a couple more times, but I had prepared for it again. Suffice to say, my computer is having problems. So, I’m annoyed, stressed, and tired from rewriting. I intended for more to happen the chapter, but at this point, I’m about to crash instead, so I’ll do a double check when I wake up if it’s shitty or needs something else.