The Wild Robot (Patreon)

This film has a 98 on Rotten Tomatoes, and that's why I don't trust people. It's one of the blandest, lamest, by-the-numbers, cliché clunkers I've ever wasted my time on.

The promotional material makes it seem like something artsy and mature. Something with a lot of atmosphere and ambience. But as soon as the fucking animals started talking I knew I was in for some gay baby bullshit.

This isn't a movie, it's an ad for A.I. chatbots that feels like it was written by one of them. The robot learns to love. Yeah, sure. Whatever you say, DreamWorks. How's that big tech boot taste?

I'd rather sit in the tub and watch my toaster go for a swim.