Kameo: Smellements of Power. (Patreon)

This is Kameo, the final sad fart of the greatest developer ever. It released as a launch game for x-box 360, which was not a console that seemed to give much of a shit about colorful platformers. This might explain why the main character looks like she doesn't belong in the hideous environment the game drops you off in. 

Kameo herself is fine. She's tight. She's colorful and bright. She looks like a Rare character in a Rare game but what the fuck is this 2005 ass brown and grey Helms Deep bullshit. This is exactly what made Microsoft's Rare acquisition so baffling and predictably ruinous in the first place. Everyone saw it coming but no one was courageous enough to say no to the money and stop it. 

One forgettable Perfect Dark prequel, a weird too realistic looking Conker remake, and Kameo Elements of Ugly Ass Shitty Looking Power later, Rare was in a fucking coffin. Don't even get me started on Nuts and Bolts.

I remember this game coming out and thinking, "she looks hot but the game looks ass". 150 years later i've finally played it and my opinion has not changed. The girl is indeed hot, and the game is indeed ass. At least the first level is, for all i know she gets naked in level 2 but i'll never know and i doubt it. I think it's more likely she just finds more hideous monsters to crawl inside. Fuck this game's entire stupid premise and butt-ugly world. It offends me. Bring Kameo back and give her a better, sexier game. This one smells.