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Twilight (Patreon)

Published:
2025-09-05 11:34:59
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:
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Content

omg the cringe!!!

Files

Previews only

AJ Twilight 1x1

Watch "AJ Twilight 1x1" on Streamable.

Comments

5Tom51

honestly, I was suprised at how much I enjoyed this. This movie is major schlock but fun as fuck. I'm fully invested in this train-wreck now!

Eliteguard99

I can't get over the fact that When Ed drops off Bella with her friends after saving her from a bunch of drunk jocks, he friends are talking about how delicious the salad they ate was. They're like "We're sorry Bella, you took so long and we were starving" but the script writer was like "We don't want these girls to look FAT DO WE? Make sure they're talking about salad!". Jesus lol

Aku

i was not able to watch this cringe, im just listening it at the background :D

TheBulleN

LSP taking over Alicia sometimes is awesome!!! xD BTW these movies make me icky in another way... (NOT HATING ON ANYONE THAT ENJOYS THIS BTW.) Just the age's and consent and shit is all thrown out of the window at some points...

Zachary McCann

To take the whole skin sparkling convo waaay too seriously (fun side convo!)... A mutation doesn't _have_ to be positive/purposeful, it just has to over a period of time not prevent sexual selection enough to continue. So the way I see it, there's a few decent reasons why acquiring shimmering in light might happen (All just my thoughts and not suggesting that the books even considered any real reason :P): 1) It occurs as a side-effect of the vampirism mutation process with no real benefit due to an interaction with some hormone in the skin or something. Edward would be appalled by it since it makes them stand out + his own feelings about how vampires behave (he sees them as killers, and this is an observable trait for him to associate that feel with). However, humans historically love shiny things and would not be deterred from boning down on them and probably want it themselves enough to accept the bite transfer. So it continues. 2) Similar to 1, maybe it's a side-effect of a different positive. I think they're shown as having higher durability (except against each other's enhanced strength, riiiip) so perhaps during the vampirism mutation process, their skin becomes infused with some other mineral to increase durability. It just has a side effect of refracting certain wavelengths of light that sunlight has in spades (that florescent lights don't). Kind of think of Translucent from the Boys on this one. 3) It could occur with purpose, but humans are a poor fit species wise. Perhaps for species with more fur, the light refracts differently and creates a shimmering aura making them hard to visually track the movements of, enhancing their ability to hunt in moderate light. But humans being largely "hairless apes" they just blast out the light without changing it enough to be a distinct advantage, so they hunt at night. Plus, even with a disadvantage like this they can still make a ton of vampires due to the lack of... consent really required for that, so it could persist with enough a-moral vamps. 4) My favorite thought is that perhaps it's just situational. What if it IS intended to enhance the human vampire hunting experience, but only at night. Moonlight is just reflected sunlight so it SHOULD have a similar effect, but at a muuuch lower scale. If that's the case, maybe the shining skin provides extra light for them to better track targets in low light scenarios such as a moonlit hunt. But during the day the amount of light is so much higher that people think that Gondor calls for aid. Definitely enjoyed thinking about this convo way more than the movie itself, <3 Pom for taking the biology angle way too seriously to enable it :P

Jack Middleton

So I took the take a drink for each lip-bite challenge and I went through a bottle of wine and a glass of whiskey, I regret nothing this reaction was amazing I will so be doing it again for New Moon.

Sref

This was so cringe i ended up covering my eyes like if it was a horror movie. I'm not kidding.

Lance Ivy

nah up the staris is easy you just tilt them back like a dolly ...down staris thats the hard one

DeathHawk31

not in a million years did I think I would watch this yet here I am, at least Alicia makes everything better

Lich109

As other people have said, Edward can't read Bella's mind because there's nothing there. Unless it's the book, in which case there's so much there I didn't need to know. Even as a kid when these books came out I didn't read through them because I had read better literature before, and I gave up quick. EDIT: The "evolutionary advantage" to vampires sparkling is that Stephanie Meyer is a racist Mormon. The vampires call the physical process of turning into a vampire the "beautification" process, and it involves turning white if you're not white already (not a joke). There is a good video called "Twilight Has a White Supremacy Problem" that goes over the whole thing really well.

GoldArthur
>>186516069

Ehh, having a thing for pale skin doesn't necessarily equal racism, unless there's something else there about the author that you didn't mention.

Otterplasty

I don’t want to be a hater, but it did feel kinda harsh to blame Kristen for the performance and in the same breathe say Robert was just given bad direction. Probably not the best choice for the roll yeah, but she definitely got fucked over by this movie just as much as he did.

DocteurNS

So this first meeting between Batman and Mr. Terrific was kind of awkward...

Mason Allen

The way I sprinted over when I saw the notification lmao these movies are so fun

Jane Doe

Man, as someone who is just as white as Bella, when I burn in the sun my skin just turns red, peels off, and leaves me with a coat of freshly snow-colored skin after. It's like... the sun takes the first few layers off and the nice, white onion flesh beneath is revealed. It's awful. Curse, you, electromagnetic radiation! My greatest foe!

Toasted Toad

The hilarious thing is that Edward only likes Bella because he can’t read her mind, so is forced to read her expressions from her face (which, in the book, is supposed to be interesting). However, if he could read her thoughts he’d realise how boring she actually is and lose interest! Also, I think RP’s antipathy for the role was not just the acting, but the awful story and terrible messaging. Edward stalks and controls her, and she’s happy about it.

LordVed

As far as admitting he's killed people, he did so in the forest during the "greatest predator" rant.

Damien Dark

Vampires suck should be the next step in the process of bleaching this out of mind

IFoundTheLight

I know I liked your friends, Pom has become a fav. She had me completely when she started talking about evolution of shiny vampires.

Talenozam

Minor nitpick about the evolutionary benefits of sparkly vampire skin. Not everything needs to be beneficial, it could be an old adaptation which used to be useful but now is not needed anymore. Similar to our tailbone, appendix. A characteristic that "isn't used" or "serves no purpose" does not disappear from a population unless a mutation occurs that reduces or removes that characteristic. Also just because this is a fantasy world (it already is, god being real or not wouldn't change that) doesn't mean every fantasy trope needs to be part of this universe. Edit: Had to check myself. The director actually got an award for this movie and a bunch of awards and nominations for their first movie. But they did indeed continue making movies and TV-shows, newest film being "Mafia Mamma" from two years ago and apparently they are currently working on a new show that's still tba which is based on the book series "The Raven Cycle".

WillGlacier

Oh shit I completely missed the vampire groomer movie post

Aliulo

16:56 - Wow, that is quite the eclectic collection of flags in that cafeteria. Yugoslavia(?) Spain Denmark Thailand Estonia Antarctica(?) The Royal Banner of the Royal Arms of Scotland(?) Peruvian War Flag(?) North Korea India Pakistan Ghana Nigeria South Vietnam(?) Greece South Africa Apartheid Flag(?!?!) Laos New Zealand Kenya, but Upside Down(?) Philippines