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Chapter 19 - Mistakes

Callum was somewhat regretful that he’d only meet with Gayle one more time. There just wasn’t any reasonable way or reason to stay in touch after she went off to the draft and did her own thing. Not that he had any designs on the girl, but it was nice to have some connection to normalcy in what was turning out to be an unreasonably stressful and isolated life.

He’d chosen to flout GAR with his eyes open, so he had no regrets about that. After seeing how they treated normal people, even going so far as to call them mundanes as if they were some lesser species, he was even more sure he’d made the right choice. Which didn’t mean it was the easy choice.

After chewing on it for a while, he decided to do something he really should have done ages ago. In retrospect, he’d been stupid to just chat with a young mage without knowing who he was interacting with, but he could only learn from his mistakes. Or, correct them, which he did with a call.

“What’s up, big man?” Lucy said, sounding chipper as ever.

“Hey Lucy,” he replied, stretching out in a recliner he’d installed in the motorhome. “How’s it going with GAR?”

“Oh man, they’re still annoyed they can’t find the vampire ghost, which is the stupidest name I’ve ever heard and I’ve heard a lot. It’s hilarious how incompetent it makes them look especially when three faerie kings have actually stated outright that you aren’t one of theirs. It’s great entertainment.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear they haven’t caught on,” he admitted. It was nice to know that he hadn’t left anything particularly incriminating behind, though that was far and away much easier to do when he didn’t have to be at the actual site. Teleportation meant that he broke up all the patterns and trails needed to track people.

“There’s a lot of vamps hunkered down in various places in case you decide to visit, from what I hear,” Lucy told him. “But since nothing’s happened for a couple weeks it’s kind of dying down.”

“Well, that’s fine with me. Never really wanted attention to begin with.” He shook his head, glad that he’d apparently gotten away clean. “Anyway, got a question for you.”

"So soon?  I can't even tell if you're down on one knee!"

Callum barked a laugh. He wasn’t exactly certain why Lucy was so flirtatious, but she had the trick of surprising him. It was nice.

“Just because I’ve given you gold doesn’t mean I’m ready to move on to diamonds,” he told her, and got a chuckle. “Seriously though, what can you tell me about House Hargrave?”

“Don’t tell me you’re involved with them?”

“I’ve met one,” he admitted. “Just a kid, honestly. Gayle Hargrave. Helped her out a bit but I’m pretty sure I won’t see her again, so I was a little curious who she really was.”

“Huh. Just a kid, you say.” There was the sound of typing from the other end of the line. “Looks like Gayle is twenty-two, hardly a child.”

“There’s twenty-two, and then there’s twenty-two, you know?” Callum told her, and she laughed.

“Yeah, sure. College kids are the same all over. What did you want to know?”

“The general score, I guess.”

“Hmm, well, I can send you a report but the long and short is that House Hargrave is one if the big old ones. Hargraves invented half of the offensive spellforms anyone uses, so they’re pretty martially inclined.”

“Gayle is a healer,” Callum noted.

“Yeah, and that’s weird. Looks like some blending of bloodlines. Houses are pretty obsessive about tracking that kind of thing, so I’m surprised you actually met her. Normally a new talent like that is under lock and key, buuuuut I guess with a family of action maybe not.”

“She was hanging out with the Larsons?” He wasn’t sure if that was relevant, but if Gayle was some powerful scion perhaps the elderly couple who ran that bookstore were more than they appeared. “I don’t know if that means anything to you.”

“Oof. Yeah they’re a couple of old warhorses.  Don’t piss them off!  If they’re around no wonder House Hargrave let her wander off on her own.”

“I have no intention to, that’s certain.  I guess I should have figured that any mage that actually looks old is liable to be dangerous.”

“Maybe? The pictures I have don’t look very old.” Callum winced at Lucy’s reply. Apparently he’d seen past a glamour without realizing it again. It was a good thing he’d never mentioned anything about it. Someday he was going to get in major trouble from that, and he made himself a note to try to use his phone’s camera more often and hopefully sidestep some of the issues.

“Anyhow, I guess I could use the information on House Hargrave, but I doubt I’ll be interacting with them again.  I was mostly curious about who it was I was helping out.”

“Probably someone you shouldn’t deal with, big man. There’s all kinds of powerful politics with the big Houses and you sure don’t need Archmages after you as well as the vamps.”

“Message received.” It meant that it was really for the best that he’d be cutting ties soon. Even positive attention could be dangerous, though he didn’t think that Gayle would suspect him of anything in particular. He just had to gracefully decline any invitation to meet anyone else.

Yet again he considered not showing up for the next meeting, but he also yet again decided against it. With only one meeting, probably one that was just going to be Gayle celebrating her new status. Or asking for help with something, but either way that would have to be the last meeting.

“So what I’m sending you is pretty much their own press statement stuff,” Lucy told him. “I’d have to dig a bit to find anything juicy.”

“I don’t need anything juicy,” Callum assured her.

“Aww, I was hoping to earn more of that gold.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll come up with a job for you soon enough.”

“Don’t keep me waiting, big man.”

“I know better than to keep a lady waiting.”

“Shame I’m not a lady, then.”

“Never been anything less with me,” Callum said with a grin. “Actually, now that I think about it, I probably am going to need to ditch this identity soon. I’d appreciate some steering on the best place to get a new one, and maybe some regions of the US where there’s very little supernatural presence.”

Running around in a motorhome absolutely muddied his trail, but it was also quite tiresome. Winut had been practically perfect for him save for the shifter and vampire politics, so if he could find something like that once again it would be nice. Through Lucy and Harry he could probably get more information on magic and try to build up a coherent understanding of modern magical theory. Something he realized he desperately needed after his discussion with Gayle.

“Boo. You could just ask me for a new one!”

“I could, but the logistics for that…” Callum shrugged, despite Lucy being on the phone and unable to see him. “I think that’d just put both of us at risk.”

“You make me very curious about who you think is after you, big man.”

“Aside from GAR?” He asked dryly.

“Oh sure, but they don’t know you are you, you know?”

“I know.” Callum shook his head. “Speaking of, and I hate to ask this because I know these types are trouble⁠—”

“Trouble like you?”

“Not like me, I hope,” he told her. “But do you have contact information for other people who might be operating outside of GAR’s laws?”

“Noooot so much,” Lucy said thoughtfully. “GAR tends to stamp on anyone that could be considered a rogue pretty hard. I know they’re out there, but usually what I see is one of the big agents reporting that they have them in custody or dead, you know? I don’t think there’s, I dunno, some kind of organized rogue syndicate or anything.”

“Not really any room for one when GAR is already kind of a criminal syndicate,” Callum muttered.

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that,” Lucy said with amusement. “The truth is, if you want stuff outside of GAR’s laws you really need to hook up with an Archmage, a faerie king, a regional alpha, or a master vampire. They’ve all got a lot more leeway than the rank and file.”

“What about dragonblooded?” It didn’t surprise him that the rules didn’t really apply to the most powerful. They never did. He was curious why Lucy had left out the fifth type of supernatural, though.

“They’re mad, bad, and dangerous to know,” Lucy replied promptly. “I haven’t heard of any actively breaking GAR rules but I’ve also only ever heard that you need to be careful around them.”

“Hmm. Fair enough. Well, if you run across some sort of black market information, I’d appreciate a heads-up.” Shahey was the only dragonblooded he’d ever seen, let alone met, and Callum couldn’t imagine him as being particularly threatening. Dangerous, yes, especially after he was attacked, but he’d just been playing an ordinary gym owner for years without a hint of trouble.

“Any specific items?”  Lucy asked, not at all bothered by the illegality of the request. “It’s probably easier to get something through backchannels than try and pull it out of GAR’s confiscated stock.”

“Weird,” he said, but didn’t argue. She was the one who worked at GAR, be it ever so rank and file. “I’m looking for information on foci and enchanting, as well as any literature on the rare aspects for mages. Gravity, healing, time, space, that sort of thing.” He hoped that his phrasing and burying his real interest would obscure things. That was as close to a direct request for gravity instructional books as he dared make.

“Huh, gotta say, that’s going to be a lot harder than actual stuff. The Archmages and Houses are pretty damn protective of that kind of thing.”

“I figured it was a long shot,” Callum admitted. “I suppose I’ll just keep my ear to the ground.”

“Gonna cheat on me there, big man?” Lucy teased him.

“Never,” he assured her. “I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t want to be involved in some of the stuff I need anyway.”

“I’ll have you know I like getting down and dirty,” she said with a laugh. “When it’s fun, anyway.”

“Oh, so you don’t care what I do when it’s boring?”

“That’s right,” she agreed cheerfully. “Just give me the highlights.”

“I actually don’t have anything exciting going on right now,” he said. “Thank goodness.”

“A shame,” Lucy said. “It’s really fun to hear the scuttlebutt from the things you’ve done.”

“I’m sure,” he said dryly. “If I do things right, though, you won’t hear anything at all.”

“Boo! I can’t blame you, though. Some of these GAR people are scary.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen a few of them,” Callum agreed. That one fishlike fae agent still creeped him out a little bit. After a few more minutes of chatting Callum finally hung up and went to go take care of his daily practice. With Gayle as a reference he had a better idea of what to work toward, and even if he didn’t have a great regimen for training he still needed to put his nose to the grindstone.

The wonder of being able to juggle portals and teleports still hadn’t worn off, and probably never would, but dismissing and reforming the same ones over and over really did make it a chore. As did trying to hold a larger and larger spatial bubble, since the moment he overextended it hurt, rather like pulling a muscle but all over. His perception distance was great, but his ability to hold any spatial construct didn’t seem to be getting better very quickly. Something the size of a vehicle was about all he could manage for the moment.

Not that he needed anything larger, but it would have been nice to have the option.

He also set aside time to go poke around the locations of vampire nests and GAR offices he’d gotten from Lucy. It wasn’t particularly dangerous so long as he didn’t do anything, especially since he wasn’t going to actually walk inside the buildings in question. Ultimately he was going to have to do something, since he didn’t want to become a hermit, and eventually he’d run into them again.

The GAR locations varied pretty significantly in terms of their defenses and local mana, but generally the larger ones had more protection. The small offices that seemed to exist only to give GAR a teleport point basically had nothing more protecting them than a minor ward or glamour, but the ones where people actually worked had controlled entry. He thought that was pretty dumb since the teleport network being unguarded meant anyone could stroll right into GAR headquarters.

Then again, it was dependent on the tattoos. There was also clearly some manual control involved, so maybe it was better protected than it seemed. Plus, he hadn’t had a look the actual GAR offices after he’d developed his spatial sense. There might be truly obscene protections on the other side.

The vampire places, on the other hand, were defended more conventionally. That meant electronic security and men with guns staffing the halls and watching the doors. They all still had a mage in residence maintaining wards, but the defenses in question weren’t nearly as structured as the ones around the GAR buildings.

Interestingly, there didn’t seem to be nearly as many defenders as in the nests he’d removed, probably because those were pushed up right against shifters and were expected to engage in violence. Instead of twice as many thralls as vamps, there was something closer to parity and a number of those were obviously domestic servants.

Also, vampires tended to live in luxurious housing complexes. So that part of the stereotype was true, at least. He wasn’t sure if vampires were actually immortal, but there were hints they were as long-lived as mages, who could get into three or four centuries at least. While he knew it was almost impossible that any vampire would spot him or even recognize who and what he was if they did, he still wasn’t confident enough to keep a watch on the nests at night.

Plus, if he caught them killing people, he’d have to wipe them out on principle and he wasn’t ready for more attention. He wasn’t even sure he could manage it, not without a lot of preparation and buildup, but his brain went to figuring out options anyway. Callum was a little more confident since he had his escape option, but still aware he was incredibly vulnerable. He could run, but he couldn’t fight anyone who surprised him.

***

Agent Ray Danforth watched the black-uniformed squad spread out over the town of Kennecut, annoyed at not having any control over the situation but unable to do anything about it. He was not trained for a real rogue mage, let alone a rogue mage with restricted knowledge, but the Bureau of Secret Enforcement was.

Despite being with the Department of Arcane Investigation, he and Felicia rarely had anything to do with the BSE spooks. Even when clashes between different supernaturals spilled out into the mundane world, it was generally fairly easy to take care of. A few glamours, some deflecting official statement, and fines all around.

Where BSE came in was when something really serious was at stake. Something that couldn’t be covered up, or something major coming through a portal world. Mages who disseminated the really dangerous, restricted knowledge that GAR and the Archmages kept under lock and key to prevent catastrophe. Or, most relevant, rogues who may have once been part of BSE themselves, ex-colleagues who could do more damage than an entire pack of shifters or nest of vampires.

The Larsons had been quite cooperative, and even knew the man they were looking for. They’d provided a glamour representation of him for the BSE team to study before the agents went to take their places around Kennecut. The couple also talked to Archmage Hargrave, who was absolutely furious, something Ray wished them luck on. The Archmage was armored up for war, his force shielding and the winds floating him from place to place turning him into some faceless god rather than the wild-haired man he often appeared to be.

Apparently even BSE wasn’t about to tell an Archmage that he couldn’t take part. Not when the rogue mage in question had corrupted his great-great-great-granddaughter somehow. Ray didn’t quite get what exactly the problem was, since the woman in question was perfectly fine. He’d gotten a redacted transcript of the interrogation and nothing there was out of the ordinary, but grandparents could be quite protective.

“Comms check.” The voice of the BSE leader sounded over Ray’s earpiece. Not that either he or Felicia were going to be much involved with the apprehension of the renegade mage, but it was still taking place inside their assigned territory so they had to be there. Or, well, didn’t have to, but they did want to.

“Aleph Check.”

“Bet Check.”

Felicia poked him in the side, distracting him from what was actually fairly tedious setup. It was rather odd to hear the agents muttering to each other when there was an Archmage right there. Hargrave could level the entire town and everyone in it, so there didn’t seem to be much need for the BSE folks, but that was above his pay grade.

“No bet,” he told her, in response to her unasked question. They’d discussed it before coming and it seemed unlikely that their mysterious killer and a rogue mage coming from nowhere were unrelated. While the vampire massacres had no magical signature, that was the sort of thing rumors attributed to BSE agents anyway, so it wasn’t impossible.

“Coward,” she accused him in a whisper.

“I like to think I’ve learned my lesson,” he told her in reply. “Come on, let’s get up top.”

The BSE agent all had advanced foci that let them flit about as if they were masters of air vis, but even they couldn’t stay airborne forever. They’d marked out vantage points covering the approaches to the Larson’s bookshop from all angles and graciously allotted one to him and Felicia. The one that was of least concern, of course, but at least it was something.

His spell reached out to wrap them both in air and lift them up to the building roof, along with a small carry-case of supplies. Felicia, unfortunately, had to get fairly close to contribute anything useful, and that was assuming her voice could get past whatever shielding he had in place. According to Gayle he was a gravity mage, but the BSE folks seemed convinced he’d have more than a standard shield in place. Still, his primary role was to get Felicia over to the mage after BSE had put a magic-blocker on, just in case it would help.

The other thing he could do was fire a shieldbreaker. It wasn’t part of the Department of Arcane Investigation’s normal loadout, but he’d requested a set from the armory and had the request granted. Especially since he could use wind to guide the charged netting to the target, which would hopefully overload any shield construct the mage would be using.

“Taw, check,” he said into his own mic after everyone had checked in. Everyone but Archmage Hargrave, who was hardly going to bother with such things. There weren’t actually enough people to justify going all the way down the alphabet, but since they were outside of BSE’s command structure they got the end.

They didn’t actually expect to see the rogue mage for hours yet. BSE had already combed Kennecut for traces of the man and found nothing. Aside from the Larsons and the younger Hargrave, there wasn’t much in the way of vis, especially not the gravity aspect that their target supposedly had. That meant they couldn’t track the so-called Professor Brown back to wherever he was laired and had to wait.

The trick now was to make sure there was nothing to spook him, assuming he actually showed for his meeting. The younger Hargrave was already waiting with the Larsons, but if things went to any sort of plan their target wouldn’t get anywhere near the bookstore. Even with their shields clamped down tight any competent mage would notice the extra people around eventually, especially the Archmage.

They were covering all the roads into town, since according to Gayle the man came by bicycle. BSE was very interested in seeing where he came from, and actually had two of their number waiting at the travel link in case he was actually using the GAR system. If he was casually traveling through GAR without anyone noticing, a lot of people were going to be looking for new jobs.

Felicia offered him a bottle of water, and he accepted, taking a swig as he positioned his telescopic focus in front of both of them. At its narrowest it was like a normal spyglass, but he preferred the window that gave him a comfortably wide view of his target. Felicia did too, since it wasn’t like the fae could use any normal focus. They needed ones fueled by charged and stored vis or mana, which was fairly expensive. Roy himself charged the few that Felicia carried.

For a while nothing much happened. It was the same old stakeout problem; they knew when the target was supposed to be there, but he could arrive early or late and either way, they couldn’t afford to miss him. Aside from a few of the stranger fae, he didn’t know anyone who actually liked stakeouts.

Conversation was sparse, since they were both watching through the lens, and Ray was listening closely with his magic-enhanced hearing. Every car and pedestrian was suspect, and the only saving grace was that Kennecut wasn’t all that busy so they only needed to look at one or two people at a time. Even so, Felicia lost interest fairly quickly and gave only a desultory look through the focus once every few minutes. Ray didn’t really blame her for that, since this was not her specialty. If it weren’t for the chance of a link between this mage and the phantom they’d been chasing, they wouldn’t be there at all.

“Dalet here. Potential target. White male, riding a bicycle, brown suit, hat, bag. North on Kent Avenue, by Fourth Street.” The words crackled over the earpiece, and Ray took a moment to remember where those streets were located before sweeping the lens over in that direction. There were a couple buildings between them and the target, but Ray was an air mage, so that was no trouble.

It was a bit of an advanced technique, but bending air density to bounce light, mirage-like, was well within his capabilities. He set his wind mirror high up to get a better perspective at what Dalet was looking at, but didn’t see the man or the bicycle. Ray started to sweep the lens when the earpiece buzzed again.

“Lost contact.” Pause. “Regained contact, west Eleventh. He’s a space mage or has a short-range teleport focus.” Even Ray didn’t have access to short-range teleport foci, so if a random mage had one that was impressive. Or worrying. If he was a space mage though, they’d have to move quickly to keep him from getting away.

“Shieldbreaker and buzzer,” Aleph ordered. “Zayin and Yod, move to intercept.” The latter two were shifters, and when they decided to move they could really move. Ray swiveled his mirror around as he stood, wrapping both himself and Felicia in a cushion of air. He didn’t dare move until the mage was neutralized, but he wanted to get there as fast as possible afterward.

The mage had stopped and was looking around, frowning. Ray had to wonder if something had given them away, despite their precautions. He doubted that any normal mage would notice a BSE team, but perhaps the hovering Archmage Hargrave was too obvious, even if he was halfway across the city.

Before he could be properly spooked, there were a pair of flashes from Waw and Tet, the latter of whom was actually riding on an invisible floating platform high above. Unlike mundane guns, the proper mage weaponry they had made no noise when they spat their payloads. Ray squinted in anticipation of the flare of shield disruption, but no such thing came.

The mage looked startled for a brief moment as the magic-disrupting net smacked him hard enough to knock him off his bicycle. The buzzer hit him while he was still toppling, the disrupter dart punching into his shoulder rather than his chest. Ray gawked at the sight of someone without even the most basic of protections, then stopped worrying about the sight focus and the mirror and lifted himself and Felicia while Zayin and Yod moved.

Shimmering walls of force popped up as Hargrave walled off three whole blocks in an impenetrable dome. Ray slowed, but a small hole opened and allowed them through, demonstrating the sort of casual knowledge and finesse that made Archmages a genuine terror. By the time he touched down on the inside, two bulky shifters, both in war form, had the man trussed up and loaded down with magic-blocker cuffs and anklets. The buzzer seemed to have knocked him completely silly, the man clearly semiconscious, but that was what he got for having no shielding or a hardened personal sphere.

A moment after he dropped himself and Felicia to the ground, Archmage Hargrave arrived with considerably more flash and thunder. The man spat out enough stray vis that it triggered Ray’s own shields, little sparks of force bouncing off and pinging against the nearby buildings. For a moment Ray was afraid that the Archmage was going to kill their only lead before they could question him, but Aleph stepped between Hargrave and the target.

“BSE thanks you for your help,” he said, despite the fact that Hargrave hadn’t needed to do anything. “We will take it from here.”

“I want him,” Hargrave growled.

“Once BSE and the DAI have completed their investigations, we will see if he can be released to your custody,” Alfa said, unmoved by the angry Archmage. The two of them stared at each other, Alfa blank-faced and seemingly immune to Hargrave’s vis manifestations, and Hargrave visibly furious behind the force visor of his armor. Hargrave blinked first.

“Very well,” he said. “But keep me informed! I want to know everything the instant you do.”

He stepped back as Aleph turned to frisk the mage, also checking earlobes, teeth, and hands in a quick and impersonal inspection. Even if he didn’t know what Aleph was looking for, he had to admit the BSE man was credibly professional. One of the other members conjured up a slab of force as Aleph emptied the man’s pockets.

“Well, damn. I guess he is the killer.” Ray stared at the small handful of ball bearings that had been in the man’s suit. It was obvious they had vis attached to them, in what seemed to be a mana acceptor pattern, but it didn’t seem to be attached to anything. “Or at least knows who it is.”

He was still baffled by how easy it had been to subdue the man. They’d all expected a rogue BSE agent, maybe even one who could shrug off shieldbreakers. That was one of the major reasons that Hargrave had been involved. They already knew he had access to restricted knowledge, which included a lot of very nasty things and might require someone of Archmage caliber to take down. Now it seemed they had overprepared, which was just fine with Ray.

“Look at the mage mark,” Aleph said holding up the man’s right wrist.

“This just keeps getting weirder,” Ray said. The tattoo was a blank one, just the two outside bands, with no House or draft affiliation. On closer inspection, the aspect marker was gone, too, and the dot there was just ink on top of the skin. It was all very bewildering, but with the man still stunned it wasn’t any time to start an inquisition. That could wait until they got somewhere he could be properly contained.

He picked up the man’s wallet, which contained nothing but cash and a driver’s license in the name of Denver Brown. No credit cards, no old receipts, not even any loyalty or business cards that he might have picked up along the way. It was the wallet of a man who had something to hide. Or rather, of a man who didn’t really exist except as a name.

“Felicia, could you run this?” He asked her, while he studied the rest of the contents of both the pockets and the bag the so-called Denver Brown had been carrying. Most mages had all their focuses organized in a proper container, so they could use them with a minimum of fumbling, but apparently Brown only had one focus, a glamour focus attached to his keychain.

There were some brass plates that were enchanted as well, which fit in with the transcript they’d gotten. Though why he’d bother keeping such clunky versions of light or telekinesis foci after providing them to Gayle, Ray didn’t know. He just found himself more and more confused as he took in what might be considered evidence, and the man himself was just as odd.

Brown was compact, a touch too much flesh to be wiry, and sort of square. Square jaw, square face, square shoulders.  The hands were soft rather than calloused, which wasn’t unusual for a mage, but they had more than a few marks and scars on them. Mages didn’t tend to accumulate scars, not like mundanes did, so that was another point toward oddity. It certainly didn’t help that he could swear that Brown’s face looked familiar.

Felicia tapped him on the shoulder. Not only had she run the man’s ID and discovered that that he owned a motorhome, which had to be nearby, but she’d searched through the GAR system to find out who he might be. As it turned out there was only one missing space mage who would have such a simplistic mark.

“Hmm.” Ray looked between the picture and the blearily blinking man that Yod was holding. The hair was different, but the jaw and the nose and the eyes were the same. “I think this is Callum Wells.”


Next 

Comments

Cirex123

Ah this gestapo shit makes me so angry, I hope the resolution of this arc will be him infinity looping an asteroid and nuking their hq from orbit

Vayash

Actually fairly disappointed with this and how easily he walked into it. Think ill wait a few weeks to come back to this.

Alex Lindsay

Well crap. Sad that he walked into this but realistically how do you expect a novice, untrained mage to wit the system forever? Hope he gets away soon.

Morog T Tiny

i hate having a cliff at the end of the month

Wolf Man

I can’t wait to see their faces when he escapes.

Andrew

Thank you!

тђє v๏เ๔

Cliff at the end of a month. Nice... Thanks for the chapter

Mr. Bigglesworth

And this garbage is just another reason to bail when it's going at 10$ a month for 4 chapters. Not paranoid enough when he knows they are out to get him, and not bothering to bail when he's told straight up she's part of a heavy hitter family. Too stupid to read anymore.

Athena Alexandria

Well good thing he can just teleport himself out when he’s awake and aware again. Yay foil focus! And it’s interesting that mundane knowledge is considered forbidden in the magic world.

BJ

Welp, that happened.

Lochar

If Callum gets out of this reasonably intact, he's now going to be the paranoid mage.

tuli

busted

Dylan K

Wow, that's what happens when you're on the run from the authorities and you relax, i suppose.

Simon Casey

Uh oh 😬 here’s hoping Callum’s emergency option works and he learns from this…

Keifru

Ah fuk Gonna be funny when he teleports out because of his internal teleport pill. Also, wow, I'm surprised at Hargraves getting so wound up over Gayle/saying she was 'corrupted'. 10c, super cynical take: they covered up the weaponized biomancy, mindblank/screwed her, and fudged her being fine on combat then blamed anything off with Gayle as Callum's fault.

Apollo Above

Whelp. GG. The Vampires and Feds win and he either gets his magic stripped and given to the Vamps or he gets enslaved and put in a dark hole somewhere.

Robert Mullins

Oof. Shouldn't have read this.

Oxykon

Damn was expecting at least something from our boy but it makes alot of sense he would'nt have any chance versus what is basically a black ops squad and a tank. Interesting you're using the hebrew alphabet took me a while to understand what Taw is :D

Blah64

Getting caught this easily feels off to me. Did not seem paranoid enough.

Bat

Man can’t be high strung all the time but big oof. Curios to see if that contingency in his body works

Talespinner Lore

He JUST SAID he wouldn't have any contact with her, and that she was going to go report on her efforts. Why the fuck is he back in town after that? I know he has the internal teleporter, but COME ON MAN!

Amelgar

I'm kinda surprised they've been able to keep offensive healing under wraps. It's not a particular hard leap of logic if you have some general knowledge of mundane medicine

returner

So what happened with his omega space sense that could notice everything? How about his ability to sense glamour?

Kingtie

Dang, thats a cliff

returner

Just realised it's a cliff at the end of the month. I get it, business is business, but I'll stop my patreon here and wait for the free chapters. Left a sour taste.

Alex Lindsay

I disagree. He thought he was being paranoid enough but he is emotionally unable to just cut people off like he probably should. Both times he’s been found out it was because he didn’t just cut people loose. He sent a message for the werewolf girl and now he keeps going back to Gayle.

BenjiVoid

That's a lot of information to filter through, and people ready to stop him. He doesn't know what he's looking for either.

Kotawa Ma

I'm still no seeing the "restricted knowledge" angle, but alright. Let's see where this goes.

Alex Lindsay

So can his internal teleporter work if they are locking down his magic? It seems that they are able restrict magic users ability to use magic.

Amelgar

Cya! The rest of us will enjoy them while they're hot.

BenjiVoid

It actually seems pretty reasonable. Normal guy with a couple of months figuring things out himself (not even training) in a world with very restricted information trying to escape from magical FBI and an angry archmage with no reason to expect a full special forces ambush after months of complete anonymity.

ThePickleBoss

All this only for him to disappear once again from their grasps

Robert Mullins

"if you have some general knowledge of mundane medicine" You answered your own question.

Dietz

Personally, I'm very interested in finding out how that even works.

matressgiant

Thank you for the chapter. Not particularly a fan of the Lucy character, seems like MC is out of character in his interactions with her as well. I understand if we need MC to get captured for plot, but as others h ave said, this is.. MC is a bit pathetic here? I dunno something about it rubbed the wrong way. Until next time

Dietz

Yeah, it's going to take some serious explaining.

Marc Whipple

He has speculated that since it's inside him, he might still be able to use it because his theory is that most suppression stuff works by keeping you from projecting your vis. I guess we're about to find out.

K

Hmm, I think after a terrible experience with GAR, he is released to Hargrave, wins him over, and then gets a backer.

Dietz

I'm concerned. While this is about what I'd expect from 'Callum vs the Black-Ops', it very much feels like an endgame mini-boss just jumped him out of nowhere. It might blow some of the mystic of the setting, but I really need an explanation soon.

Konstantin Parkhomenko

Hmmm. Well, they obviously won’t leave him alone after this. Time to introduce GAR to orbital bombardment. Look up Project Thor. He can already do this — all he needs is to borrow some tungsten rods and a space suit. He’s got their base locations.

Joseph

Doesn't make much sense as the "restricted knowledge" he provided could be had by anyone with internet access or a biology textbook. Chapter made worse by classic idiot ball moment from the MC in going back and taking a large and pointless risk. On top of that all a plot hole from all that magic use leaving no trace, when he can so easily see traces left behind from far far lesser things. Kinda rough all around this one.

Connor Kelly

From what I can see from this chapter, Callum just got nuked by magical spetsnaz. I've seen about half the comments saying they're going to quit the patreon just because of a cliff. That's y'all's right but I think it's silly although I do agree that four chapters for a 10 patreon can be a little steep, but it's a choice to donate not a privilege. We may get a bonus chapter somewhere, and I think this is all just a setup. RMC has a way of warming his way out of situations. I think this was just a massive foil to set up callum's competency as the vampire goes and the rogue mage. There's already one archmage that's seriously pissed off that he escaped from them with Duvall. Now he's got hard grave thinking that he's corrupted his granddaughter most likely through high level restricted weaponized bio weapon by attacking cells magically. I would think that would be pretty damn restricted given the past experience of the GAR. I think over next month we will get some interesting explanations and possibly some furthering of callum's training, providing he stays in custody long enough. This is a case of mundane arts aspecting the magical competency. But mundane arts are beneath magic and thus are look down upon. Except for those in the know, who realized that mondayans can seriously affect magic and they don't want general users to know that thus limiting contact. Or they think he's a rogue agent, but that last bit at the end makes me think that they're going holy crap we found the rogue space mage. I don't know juicy things juicy things, looking forward to next chapter. Just wish they came faster. Have a great weekend folks. PS, we've already seen how inept the magical is it tracing people through the mundane means of hiding. And thank you for the chapter IC.

Jack Smith

Just a small suggestion, it might have been beneficial if you’d have emphasized the MC’s knowledge that he shouldn’t visit his student cause of the magical FBI after him, but still have him explain that he cant just leave like last time because of the emotional connection between his student, and how he would feel wrong about just disappearing with out even saying good bye. P.S. its important to remember that MC’s (or at least some of them) are human, that means being flawed and not being able to go for long periods of time with minimal normal human contact and then leaving the person you work with/teach the second you learn that being in contact with them is potentially dangerous. (Even more so when he’s successfully given the magical equivalent of the FBI the slip on every turn so far and is getting kind of full of himself)

PoG

I don't mind he got caught, but what he was stupid enough to approach for another meeting after finding out girl is related to archmage and one of the old families

TargetDrone

written yourself a bit into acorner... him escaping a second time is borderline unbelievable. him getting executed ,brainwashed or enslaved makes the story uninteresting. thats the problem with on the run stories.... authors are tempted to pull out the caught you card, but ... it is one thing if the MC is caught by some local vamp or other supernatural, but being caught by GAR, after he allready escaped their grasp once, and after his vampire stunt, yeah, not happening.

NFH

The idea that he researched his target, found credible information about her background but didn’t inquire about if she passed her tests or altered his approach bothers me. It would seem that his senses should have also picked up on the team of agents. He can see past all glamor, recognize vis, and notice people shouldn’t be in the air or on top of building in that quantity. This seems solely set up for plot, which is fine but also coming off as rather forceful.

Mai0e

„Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.“ I have to mirror the other commentators in how disappointed I am in the MC and this chapter. He now committed the same critical mistake twice. I understand he is after all a human being driven partially by emotions and not 100% rational. But as said, he already has made the same mistake not too long ago with the memo to one of the shape-shifters, which lead him to be tracked down. He even properly reflected on it, but what does he do now? Exactly the same mistake.  A properly paranoid person would never ever commit to the risk under the circumstances like from the this meeting. Especialy because he even got properly warned short beforehand. There was even nothing to gain anymore. The contact itself with her was a calculated risk, which paid off as he got a look at the teleportation device. The meeting where he kept his promise with the shield device was already  overstaying it, but it was in character because he always tries to keep his promises, which make him admirable. Things like this meeting now just dumb down the story, he is supposed to be a paranoid individual evading the government, if he commits to the same mistake thrice you can just rename the story from there on to "dumb mage". Even now, the title paranoid mage is not exactly fitting anymore. To clearify: I dont have anything against the fact he got captured!This is good and makes things more exciting. The problem is why it happend. The decision of our MC to meet her again for no reason are the complete opposite to paranoid.

Eb

A lot of people in this comment section need to remember that they are talking to (at?) a person.

TargetDrone

cant see him escaping, not after he slipped them once and after his stunt with the vampire nests... if he does, GAR would be a joke, and not to be taken serious in the first place

Teatime42

Escape may not be the point exactly, "The truth is, if you want stuff outside of GAR’s laws you really need to hook up with an Archmage, a faerie king, a regional alpha, or a master vampire. They’ve all got a lot more leeway than the rank and file.” Already one Archimage that was interested in him, might just be his saving grace. And now he'd owe them a debt too, for saving his bacon.

Alex Lindsay

I’m sure we’ll learn more when they “interview” him after his arrest.

Alex Lindsay

It didn’t seem like a large risk as he absolutely doesn’t realize that the knowledge he gave Gayle was sensitive

Mai0e

It's an invaluable skill to be able to take and give criticism. Speaking through the flower just impairs this communication and at best softens the perceived need for improvement.

Alex Lindsay

I think it’s important to remember he is very new to this and this is a process as he becomes truly paranoid. It’s good to remember he was a law abiding citizen for all his life until this all occurred.

Athena Alexandria

Y’all need to work on your reading comprehension and empathy if this chapter is making you “rage quit” the Patreon

Mai0e

Same mistake twice… the wolfpack tracked him also down because he didnt properly cut contact.

Alex Lindsay

Also, we don’t know that he will escape right away. He might be sent to the front lines! Let’s give the author the benefit of the doubt as I’m sure he thought of most of these issues. I can’t wait to see how he’ll solve them!

TargetDrone

well, can only talk for myself of course, but i didn't unsub because of a cliff, but because the story for me turns either unbelievable or boring. unbelievable if he manages to escape from GAR again or isn't treated like a dangerous criminal (shackled, executed, lobotomized. ... ) , boring if he is ( shackled, executed, lobotomized)

Mai0e

there is no reason for him not to be absolutely paranoid already now

P enyuk

Counter Arguement: The Archmage wants to help the man who helped his granddaughter and his temper is a Potemkin Village for GAR.

Pebble

Getting captured might actually be an opportunity for Callum. Back when he went to check out that GAR office, he didn't dare trying to peek into the heavily warded areas, but now they'll conveniently take him inside one such area, and if he is right about his hypothesis on how his perception power works, then it should be completely unaffected by the restraints. He could also reason out some things out of the questions they ask him during interrogation. They'll probably use that Siren, Felicia, to try and Glamour him to make him talk, so he just needs to pretend to be affected by her ability, and if they think that he is affected, they may be more open about what they say in front of him, or the questions they ask. He'll also get to observe other Mages from up close, and not just any average ones, but the especially talented and very well trained ones. That should give Callum some insights as well. Also, seeing how Archmage Hargrave wasn't able to order the BSE around, means that Callum should be safe from that other archmage looking for him as well, while in their custody. EDIT: Since he is unaffected by Glamours, this will especially be a great opportunity to see things that are concealed from other Mages (and others in general). Everyone there is probably too trusting of Glamours and will leave things out in the open, expecting them to remain hidden - but they won't to Callum.

TargetDrone

why would you send a dangerous criminal to the front lines? also, if he isnt executed, i guess there are some vamps demanding satisfaction?

Justin

Thankfully we have you to give us vague posts and teach them a clear lesson.

11037

Wow, the instant the protag isn't OP or all-knowing, I guess it's time to bring out the pitchforks? People need to chill and accept that having an even slightly realistic person as protagonist means they can't win all the time.

Colby Last

I have no problem with the story, but I have a problem with all the time we wasted explaining Callum's future plans. Now we have a horrible cliff hanger because we had to listen to Callum monologue for five pages.

David Hall

Wheres the secret patreon for the patreons. I need to read more

Deinos

I guess he'll get to use his emergency jumper earlier than he expected. Well, no good deed goes unpunished. Just wondering what he left behind of his treasures in the motorhome.

Lochar

It's not that he lost that's the problem, it's that it's totally one-sided and out of character for being paranoid and literally the rest of the chapter build up of 'here's a whole bunch of things about this family which means they're big hitters' that should have thrown up flag to walk away because he had nothing left to gain.

Zarik0

A lot disapointed by this turn of event, feel totally forced and unplausible with unrealistic action and though of our MC For the attachment and why he come close and come back and all that with people im okay for the werewolf girl and all that because they have months of normal interaction and they where on the same side and all that (family, a drama together, etc) but Gayle? that forced as shit, she is just a brainwashed little girl (who he know gonna kill and sell him in a second if she know) he know nothing about her and he just use her to get infos and help her a bit in return, the emotionnal attachment and "normal" interaction with her is so nill, its so bs and forced and stupid If he want more "normal" contact and "safe" more "relaxing" interaction why he dont come say hello to the family of werewolf? that give him this aspect that he need, stop being cautious and paranoid when he know now more infos about the shit Gayle interaction can be is............im not saying no for maybe a last meeting because he can still get thing out of it and close this properly, but the author gonna really need to fool prof (dont know how he can manage that) on the MC POV in next chapter, they are too many thing who are totally out here Im a lot disapointed with this turn of event it feel to forced and stupid as shit and bs for our MC and his situation........... And how he cant detect and be cautious about them? did he cant detect every vis and magic thing when they are all using it scanning the city and waiting in ambush and flying in the air? did he go into the town like some rando moving in not checking thing at all and be cautious? and he teleport when he is into the town so be sure to increase risk?............ im "ok" that he get caught but not like that, feel forced and bs and unplausible and irrealist with his past action/though and caution and paranoia of our MC..... That just doesnt make sense, forced loose of him followed by a forced plot win soon i guess We get here some multiple big aspect i was afraid the author go in, hope he can pull it off in the end but i dont expect it that he do it in a perfect satisfactory and plausible way (too hard to do), that a big "negative" point here for me (seem im not alone on this, that it feel unateral) and its clash and swimming away if you compare with the exciting premise and what was already build in the story, i cross finger and will hope, but it feel really bad to use this in a forced and fast/rushed way like that for "advance" the plot

Mr. Bigglesworth

Not even that, he can just loop a small chunk of high-density matter through 2 portals, then when it hits a fraction of light speed create a 2nd portal with the endpoint above the base. Instant annihilation strike. Bonus points if he uses a ball bearing that stops his vis from being in the strike zone for the attack.

Parker Groseclose

While I am also discontent with the last chapter, its only because it is a flaw with the online fiction format. If this was released all at once I doubt there would be as much of an out cry. Give the story time to flow from here, the quality of the writing is good and if nothing else I look forward to how paranoid Callum becomes after this.

Sebastian Viller

It was stated that Hargrave was literally halfway across the town, and from descriptions it doesn't seem like MC's detection range is anywhere near that far. It was also described that he stopped and seemed to be on to the abnormal Vis nearby after his most recent teleport, but his reaction time just wasn't enough to jump before he was stunned silly. I do agree that given the option, MC would have gone for all the info on Gayle when offered by Lucy. That would have fit with his 'paranoid' character much better than being loose like this. Definitely feels like the same paranoia that caused him to jump town so hard in the beginning is basically entirely gone, for no discernible reason.

Armo

It’s laid out in chapter 18: “He drove his motorhome off to the nearest likely national forest, which took up most of the time he’d allotted. There just weren’t any near the Mississippi River. He had a big pack made up that combined some survival supplies, like food and camping equipment, and emergency backups, like his extra gold and cash, a thumbdrive with all his work, and a bunch of guns and ammunition. It was weighty, but he didn’t need to carry it around until after he’d found his target. It wasn’t long until he was out of sight of anyone, and began teleporting up into the wilderness of the Rockies, wanting to put more than a few miles between himself and civilization. Fortunately, it didn’t take long to get out into the middle of nowhere, and start planning out his stash. Most of it could go in duct-taped trashbags, buried under the ground, but the receiver plate had to be out in the open. Some incidental debris would be fine, since the teleport would shove aside anything that wasn’t too massy, but he didn’t want to get rock or mud or fallen branches on top of it. Nor did he want it carried off by animals or accidentally turned upside-down or the like.”

Einar Strandberg

What really amazes me is that they consider "hey, you could try hurting people with healing magic" to be restricted information somehow. I'm sure we'll get more information. Maybe it's that they expect him to know about whatever is restricted and think he was trying to lead her to developing it?

Michael

This was extremely disappointing. The only thing I do not have an issue with is that experts caught him BUT they went in expecting a gravity mage. Just like a strike team in the real world that receives bad intel can severely backfire on them that is also true in this situation. If they had a space mage on their team suddenly it’s a lot more believable but they have no reason to do that expecting a gravity mage unless a space mage is established to be with all strike teams. Hell it even states he uses air magic to “hide” which would be a giant beacon to someone used to watching the magic flows around him. Not even considering it has been established he has the equivalent of true sight and would have seen a bunch of people floating in the air causing an appropriate response even if he did return. As stated by many there are zero reasons to go back. Out of character to not consider she went to evaluation. We all know what the major crimes are so that we can avoid them. Every mage that grows up in that society would know what is taboo such as weaponizing healing especially with how intermingled the two worlds are. I cannot imagine every member of an entire society is an arrogant piece of shit that’s just one dimensional nonsense. You have a shifter as a cop he would get medical reports where pertinent and that’s just one out of who knows how many. The other problem I have with them shitting on mundane knowledge is that implies people are dropping dead from tetanus, cancer, disease anything you can imagine and not taking advantage of scientific knowledge because as far as I know it has not been established that magic makes you immune to the disease and other such mortal concerns. Was really fun picking up a story with an MC that actually thinks and plans not just counts on luck of the universe or have everything handed to him. This could have been handled a lot better.

Bejan Bosc

My theory is that he let himself be caught so he can analyse how the teleportation matrice works

LordDark

Seems to me the largest Crime in GAR is freedom of thought, which funnily enogh is the one thing you dont want to advertise as being a crime.

Justin

So if he really wants to throw a monkey wrench in the works he should yell something like "master save me!" before he teleports out.

MrrC

Also really disappointed with the character. Normally the author doesn't have his characters go against everything that he's built up in terms of characterisations (e.g Blue etc). The lack of plot armour is a reasons for the interest....but what has been done now is so heavy handed plot shift that it's made me lose interest. Enjoy fellow readers - but I'm not renewing.

MrrC

Interesting view. It looks like the majority of readers don't object to Cliffs - they object to the lack of internal consistency shown by the character. IMHO that's the crux of the issue and driver of reader discontent. It reduced (for me) the value of the $10/month sub - since the quality of writing assumes at least the characters are internally consistent....I get the author may be struggling with this and writing as fast as he can - but the reader reaction is strong enough that its clear the disappointment is NOT with the plot point of being captured ..... its the plot point of the character breaking consistency to force an event and thus breaks suspension of disbelief.....investment in the character.

Hellmo

So much for being paranoid. That magic net, even if it is soundless, he should be able to know something was wrong in his spatial awareness and just blinked out. Expected a lot of chasing really. Might've been better if they trapped him magically instead of *flash* surprise! We are invisible and you can't see us. Even though the MC has spatial awareness and feel that something was off. A bit disappointed. Felt like a forced plot.

Matt DiMeo

Showing a distinct lack of paranoia, there, Callum.

Jacob

Something I think to consider is he still has human reaction times his sphere only covers I think a couple hundred yards and a net fired from a magic gun design to take down rogue mages probably travels faster than a bullet so at best he probably has milliseconds to react. Also while his teleports are fast they still take thought and effort to do so even if they only take him a second to do he would have been hit several times over.

Alex Almond

This chapter feels way to forced for the plot. I can get going back the last time, maybe, cos that just human failing. But with what we know of his senses range, and his supposed paranoia, and the bad intel the strike team had, I don't really see how he was caught so easy, without even a chase, or him even spotting them when there's no reason his range shouldn't work. Have fun you guys but I was only getting this tier for a month bc of a cliffhanger, I prefer to read on RR.

Scruffleupagas

The way the end of this chapter just didn't fit to me. He intentionally doesn't teleport around where people could see him and yet doesn't sense all these new people watching? They can't hide in glamours or in regular space from him....sooo what? Also he didn't immediately teleport when people pop out of nowhere to shoot even if he doesn't hear a shot they suddenly move on him. I was already iffy about paying $10 for 4 chapters a month I think I'm going to pause for now and see how the story plays out later.

MazalTan

Yeah, feels out of character. Expected to be caught one day, but this feels real anticlimactic.

Bsreads

As much as I love this author and this story people might be right this just isn't a story that plays well with once a week. Blue was ok because it wasn't really much fast paced action but this story is a lot about action and all we got this week is 1 phone call and 5 minutes of our paranoid mage walking straight into a trap and not reacting. Might need to let some filler build up on this one.

NFH

Thank you for helping me figure out what bothered me so much about this story and the author’s schedule. I complained when I realized the daily chapter wasn’t the actual normal. The price of the subscription is too high for a weekly chapter, in my opinion, and I couldn’t fathom why people were okay with it. The pacing of the story and the majority of stories I read are not slow burn, per say. Your comment articulated my frustration in a way that seems less harsh without being less truthful. Thanks for that.

Some person

The man watched as a team moved above him and shot a net at him … he absolutely let himself get caught. Glamour is non effective as is invisibility…. Also they can’t remove the teleport homer in his chest so he has an escape plan ….

Some person

I’d say give it one more chapter. Pretty sure he decided he wanted a look inside GAR. If not then I too will be disappointed

Robert

It’s been pretty clearly demonstrated that Callum highly values politeness. He had no reason to suspect that this last meeting would go badly. Learning that she’s from a big family shouldn’t have changed anything considering that was always the case. Plus the thing that tipped them off was the combat healing which he has negative reason to think was going to raise an alarm.

tibbish

He didn't really have much emotional connection with her though. Him going back, even when he didn't agree to, IMO (and lots of others feel the same here) feels forced and out of character. Him getting caught is a huge no no because of that AND the inevitable flood of plot armor + "convenient coincidences" that will have to be applied in order for him to escape. And he WILL have to escape. There is no way they'd keep him alive for long. Breaking major rules + pissing off seriously powerful people in that society as a nobody = dead. The story is pretty good for the most part but in this chapter I'd say the author is trying too hard to crank up the drama or action to 11. There is so much of it to go around already in story that its really not needed at all IMO.

tibbish

Politeness doesn't matter vs his freedom and survival though. And learning she is from a powerful family would mean that he'd know powerful people would eventually be around her which would mean sticking around is a obvious no-no. He also just had a recent lesson in learning not to keep going back to the same place over and over from the shifters tracking him. It makes him predictable and that leads to him getting caught and he knows that very well. The whole circumstance was pretty much a business transaction with them helping each other. There was no real friendship there. So him coming back doesn't make sense. Of course neither does the whole reason why the secret police got involved either. There is definitely some plot forcing going on here. Its also pretty much guaranteed to lead to a whole bunch of plot armoring and "convenient coincidences" too in order for him to survive and escape since getting captured means he'd be pretty turbo fucked if you're being even vaguely realistic (within the confines of the story) and reasonable. All that is a big part of the reason why people are not happy.

George Cooper

Love this! It's good when everything doesn't go well for the main character, this very nicely breaks the plot armour! Adds some gooood tension!

Aclys

I mean its in the chapter name, Mistakes, and I personally dont see it as wierd that a team of actual mage agents specialized for these kinds of takedowns on Real rogue mages that have the full training and gear can actually catch Callum in an ambush if they get to set one up like this. His main protections where Always that he was just one dude in a billion dudes, some of whom are magical and many who are not. Take that away and this was always going to be the result. I for one am eagerly curious to see what happens next :D

Deinos

Reading some of these nay-sayers I'm baffled. Normally it's me ripping stories a new one because of unrealistic behavior and yadda yadda. This here is very much the opposit, it's a sweet change where I feel like Finally the MC in a story is allowed ro make realistic mistakes. The only gripe I'd have is that it's quite convenient said self-provoked mistake only erupted in his face After he finished his contingency. Apart from that it's a balm for my soul that read too much sugarcane wish fulfillment in other stories.

Nairne

Right? I mean I suppose he might have gotten careless, but he was just told he has been dealing with someone ho belongs to a great house. Feels like the Paranoid part went to sleep.

tibbish

Him getting captured is pretty much a "game over" moment for him so its something that CAN'T be allowed to happen if you want to maintain suspension of disbelief. Also the MC has been making lots of realistic mistakes all over the place. He constantly gets things wrong. That is how the wolves tracked him down remember? He is still usually smart (read: paranoid) enough that he can get out of the situation before he gets caught. Basically him getting busted here is the equivalent of Skywalker getting his ship shot down before he blows up the Death Star. Once that happens making it so that Skywalker would somehow still blow up the Death Star in a sensible fashion pretty much becomes impossible. The only thing the author could do at this point to save the MC is have the MC's magic still be usable for ~~"unknown"~~ reasons while he is locked up and he teleports out. Which is a real stretch to say the least. It was always bound to go over as well as "Jedi Super Speed" did.

Enkelados

Si many weird outraged takes on this chapter. Man got comfortable and slipped. Like he did before. Got taken out by special killer squat, what a surprise. And the corruption/restricted knowledge thing. Guys mages don't hate physics and not use it because it's mundane. Hargreaves is angry because a weirdo gifted his daughter a jerry rigged anti- tank weapon disguised as kitchen knife. You would be angry too. Maybe she could have gone to jail for having that focus. I bet it's not restricted in the "nobody can know it exists" but in the you need a license and a good reason to carry that spell.

tibbish

He had no reason to get comfortable though. Instead he had every reason NOT to be comfortable or show up. The point about the medical knowledge is there is no way to restrict it and therefore there is no way it makes sense for them to act like its a big deal she'd have it or use it as she has. Other healers would be doing the same all over the place. If all that was needed was a license then she would've immediately realized that after doing some research on the info. It'd be like doing research on owning grenade launchers or some other Destructive Device in the US. Instead she was surprised that it was a issue at all.

Enkelados

It's nowhere stated it's the knowledge. It's the spell focus. You know how to make a gun, doesn't mean you can make one or are allowed to carry one. You know how you aren't allowed to carry certain knives in some countries? You usually don't go on the internet to research it you can carry the one you have. Also she just didn't know it was forbidden, so why would she research it? Well he got away with killing over a hundred people and running away for months. Not even glimpse of GAR. Of course he got careless. That's how serial killers get usually caught, they get cocky.

tibbish

She researched the info he told her about when she was trying to come up with ideas on how to use her healing magic as a offensive attack. Any details about legality for her would've popped up while she was looking into it. And again he had no reason to get comfortable with her or the circumstances either. Meeting her again was a bad idea straight off. If you read the previous chapter he pretty much states he knows it too and doesn't actually agree to come back as well.

Nairne

Good writing would warrant another chapter at this time to dissipate the bad taste that seems to be in the majority of the readers mouths. I want to believe IC has a really satisfying next chapter prepared. One that will blow this one and us away. The issue is that we are left feeling like things happened to the character we really care about, and the only PoV is from the garbage organisation no one here probably would join if given the choice. Of course the other comments have a lot of validity to it. It does feel like IC has written himself into a corner. I don't see Callum making a split second decision to get caught if he has stepped into a trap like this. He does have the angle of not wanting others to see what he is capable of going for him but he is risking too many of his contacts. Being paranoid is not just about readiness to cut one's self from others, emotionally or otherwise. It would be fair to the patreons to get another chapter over the weekend to try to restore some faith. Even if IC is having trouble writing this, a show of good faith would probably go a long way in maintaining his audience's interest and willingness to believe in his ability to be on the level with his readers. Otherwise this just feels bad, and possibly even like a last ditch cash grab, before the story tumbles through a trash disposal site, and the author potentially loses a major portion of his audience and a large portion of income. Cheers. Still debating if I want to renew...

Monadologist

I think the external POV for this chapter, while it shows a lot of perspective on what is going on is a big mistake. It tells the reader far too much. Consider the alternative telling, wherein he rides towards town, notices something awry and gets basically one-shotted. Less is told, he wakes up in a cell. Berating himself for his stupidity and then activates his implant and flees. We still don't know what the authorities know, but it's surely more than we knew they know! And then paranoia sets in, and he clearly feels like Gayle betrayed him, and his burgeoning efforts to open up a little to the outside world were a mistake. On the other hand, with this telling the divergence between the amount of information the protagonist has and the reader has continues to grow, making his justified in-world actions seem more like bumbling writer-induced incompetence rather than rational responses, which is rather hard to recover from. Continuing in this direction, you'll need to quickly bring the character up to common knowledge with the reader or they won't be able read his actions in a positive rational light. In general readers/users are good at identifying problems, not at calling out good solutions, but I felt the need to at least mention the issue I see with this chapter.

WinkyFace

I agree with some people that one chapter a week is pretty tough. Perhaps the author can try out splitting them in two?

Mai0e

💯%. I think a revision of this chapter is needed.

Michael

Definitely agree with your statement but what I see most consistently and believe myself is the MC going at all was a mistake. He even started to learn how he is lacking defensively and prior behavior would have indicated he sought to correct this (doesn’t mean he would succeed)

Deinos

Now to unpack this.. First of all I don’t proclaim what 'most readers want', what 'good writing is', that 'he has to write another chapter or I won’t renew' and so on, since all of those are very presumptuous, condescending and subjective. What I take out of this and most things I flipped through is you're grumpy that the MC isn't perfect, which has the complete opposit effect on me. We all decide on a daily basis on ups and downs, risk and reward of certain actions. Sometimes we lean more on safety and sometimes we don’t. To me he decided out of the nothing-happened-so-far-so-it-should-be-ok bias. In the real world there isn't even a lead up when shit hits the fan and it could happen at any point in time that has something to do with what we did/didn’t do, or it didn’t. People caught in real life could simply be recognized by someone somehow somewhere or they left the most inocuous thing behind, which they did a thousand times before already when nothing happened. So I bet if he was caught seemingly out of the blue I imagine even more people would be on the barricades screaming bloody murder because their wish fulfillment wasn’t narrow as an arrrow, yet I would have loved it.

Mai0e

Oh man, nearly 200 comments, the title seems very fitting to the chapter now. I think the best way so solve this mess, would be to make a revision to this chapter.  Keep everything the same, but in the last scene where we wait with the officers' for the MC to arrive, he just never shows up. That will keep the suspense in the story and also bamboozle future readers who will think MC is about to get caught.

Michael

My take on why this chapter got so much backlash is because people became invested in a thinking planning character that did not rely on luck of the universe or all solutions handed to MC on a silver platter. This whole recent turn of events clashes with what the mc has established as his character. Another commenter points out that the change in POV was the huge mistake because it provides too much information. In doing so us readers can point out an insane amount of flaws and he is right but the majority who feel this encounter is so forced because he would no longer get anything from going it’s not like this last visit would give him something vital to survive.

Armo

Oh wow, people are angry that ‘paranoid’ is not ‘plans everything perfectly and is absolutely rational’, but only means ‘characterised by or suffering from the mental condition of paranoia’. He’s not a planning god, he’s a careful person. Making a call to meet a person you helped out for like the seventh time is not ‘acting out of character’. He had zero reason to think the GAR were onto him - Lucy even confirmed it! He didn’t make any noticeable mistakes he knew about. I want to reiterate that this was strictly not ‘acting out of character’. If this is what you believe, you are either mistaken, deluded or throwing a tantrum because everything didn’t go how you’d want it to. I don’t particularly like that Callum’s fate is out of his hands for a bit, and we don’t know if or how he’d escape. This makes the reader feel helpless, something that is unsettling but may be necessary. Nevertheless, I can guess that he will escape. My guess is based on some evidence. First, the title of the next book (that starts at chapter 21) is ‘Renegade Mage’. IC stated this on Discord. That title leads me to believe Callum will get away next chapter, and continue flouting the law. Second, we have multiple unconfirmed ways in which Callum could reasonably escape, even if they knew about space magic. We don’t know how much of Callum’s repertoire is weird/fucky/OP in the magical world. His ward bypass might be able to bypass the bracelets. His contingency might port him through wards, because it connects via 4D shortcut. He might get a genius idea while going through the teleporter and redirect the destination, letting him leave. What I mean is that there’s a lot of possibilities for Callum to escape, even the clutches of what seems like a prepared and more powerful opponent. That is mostly because Callum’s abilities have not been properly stress-tested yet.

Alex Lindsay

One thing appears certain, IC has made a character people really care about or there wouldn’t be such strong reactions. If he can write his way into a sort the upset people can accept, then I think this story will do very well.

Maykon Henrique Mendes

It's not about being "upset", this chapter is all over the place and feels like another person wrote it and we already got a cliff on chapter 18, what happened to Gayle? Why is she just a npc here?

Dahak

It's odd to me that Callum is apparently not allowed to make mistakes. People are freaking out that he wouldn't just expose himself to this, but that is what he has been doing since he started a regular study session with Gayle. This was what was going to happen. His ignorance of the magic world caused this. Just because he is cautious doesnt mean he doesn't screw up. He's lucky they went with capture rather than KOS given what they thought about him going into it.

selskghrvkeb

It’s odd to me that a supposedly paranoid person who has displayed competency in numerous previous instances would make decisions that clearly go against previously made ones. Chapter 1-4 Callum would never in a million years return to Gayle after getting all he could from her. Hell, even though contacting the Shifter Alpha about the girl he saved was ALSO OOC, it at least set precedent. This chapter should have been a lame stakeout where Gayle gets a phone call (thanks to the hacker he’s paid off, who is currently sending him newspaper articles) that says thanks don’t contact me. Instead I’m reading something that already happened once in this story, an ignorant guy get apprehended by people who “know” more than he does.

Adam Roundfield

Ah the controversy... If this were my story I would have done one small thing slightly differently. I would have him "accidentally" drink just a bit too much (because lonely) and then decide to go to the meeting. Alcohol makes bad decisions happen mmmmkay.

Thransk

Thank you for the chapter! Looking forward to the next one!

NoodleGod

Wow people are angry. I liked it though, even if I'm not excited about the cliff

fennek

Dunno why people are so upset. It can't always go the mc's way. He's not perfect mad a mistake and now they got him. I think he will still get away with his internal teleport focus. Takes him a few minutes to charge up, an boom homeportalscroll.

Nairne

That would make it very plausible, even if it would undermine the character (at least in my eyes). Also I don't think we had an instance in the story where he went towards alcohol during the period when he was escaping (though I could just be remembering wrong, feel free to remind me) - so it would have to have been established that it's something he does, drinking alcohol to unwind.

Zarik0

The real point who stick out bad is the maintain of suspension and disbelief is so much dead, the story turn 180 with the rabbit out of the bag suddenly (with discutable forced and bs reason for it happen) and basically all thing is disclosead (him space mage, who is he, him the killer and yada yada, realisticelly the story is just over, its another one now, with same character and all that but totally different and for sure with forced and bs reason for the plot gonna continue if its try return on this tension) the whole point of the story who was exciting and interesting was with the hunt and hide play (roman police type and survival type with bread of crumb here and here and all the different move of the different party who get them) and him managing to survive and struggling to live (and create a place for him) with his cautious and paranoid mindset vs a world like that with GAR and other people he cant do shit vs in the first place, this aspect is just dead, the author just throwed all of this suddenly and in a rushed way (when it was not at all finished, so much was still tense and the situation for the MC was still really bad and hard, he was just beginning on this) That create a bad taste when the whole point a lot of people come into the story was exactly that, this excitable and interesting aspect and slow move following the different bread of crumb the different party get, all of this is just throw suddenly here with unplausible reason, it feel forced and rushed for i guess "advance" the plot...... The suspension of disbelief and the interesting and exciting thing slowly builded in the story is dead in a plouf manner and suddenly Yes we still have his past with parent and his lineage mystery with his special ability to explore now, but all what was build before in the last 19 chapter is pretty much dead, the story turned a 180 and now it will be a whole different story and plot totally different, that left a bad taste when the initial build up was totally not finished and still tense and have still so much potential :) The game of staying out of the radar with the little slip and error here and here and him growing on this aspect (cautious/paranoid and getting better and have long term plan and fail safe creation) and misunderstanding of people over the bread crumb is just........over, all of the hidden piece and subline of plot and weaving of the different indice are out in one shot who feel forced and rushed, i know it is really hard to writte that but it was what was amazing on the story (the tension and suspension and disbelief of this game is is forced to play to survive and try to live because if he really slip its can be game over, who is pretty much it now if its realistic) now im afraid it just gonna go into generic drama relationship and blabla armor plot so he get out in some way and go into the play of the old family game of power with some of them as relation and off course "change the world and punish the "bad" guy" in the end xDDD (i pretty much prefered to stay into this impossible situation he was in with all the yoyo hight and low with the game cat and mouse and how he cope with it and survive first and live latter) Im sure the author will writte a good book with this (he already proved he have the skill), im just pretty frustrated he basically throw the premice and this amazing idea/concept (suspension of disbelief) he have build in the first 18 chapter like that (forced and rushed with all in one go) and get the story a 180 turn to "advance" the plot in this new way

Scott W. Pike

Guys I think we just need to cool down I know it sucks that we get a cliffhanger thing here and it does seem a bit weird that he didn't see them coming considering his weird spatial awareness Vision but we have not seen things from his perspective so the writer may just be waiting to reveal it to us so I just feel we should just wait till next week see how it turns out we are probably all just upset because it's a cliffhanger for us and we have to wait a week to see how it results

Koral

Just one little slip up can make all the difference, especially with the magical FBI involved. I believe in his unorthodox spacey abilities tho, and hasn’t he overloaded a magic blocker before? It’s gettin juicy

Richard David Reily

I'm pretty certain he's gonna end up using the teleport beacon/bead thing he put inside of his belly. Like it's gonna be fine, and we'll probably get a decent info dumb on some other plot stuff.

John Loder

Jesus, this is an insane thread. I do hope the author ignores it. Very good chapter I thought.

Dax

Thanks for the chapter. My one complaint is that having his capture be from a different PoV meant there was zero tension. It was quite literally happening to someone else.

Arcanum Veritas

I kind of expect the next chapter to start from MC perspective and replay the snatch and grab from his perspective. Remember that while its a cliff hanger for us right now, those who read it later as a book chapter, not so much.

Mai0e

Yes it is a insane thread, because author did some very questionable choices to a up to now fantastic story. We will see how it develops …

X Y

Will Callum be able to trust Lucy after this? From his POV, he asks Lucy about Gayle, and immediately after there is an ambush. How likely is this a coincidence? This chapter is an even more severe blow to him than it first seems: he is in custody, he has an Archmage as a new powerful enemy, the GAR has his records, phones and soon probably his contacts. He has no allies left if he mistrusts Lucy and his relationship with the Alpha is compromised. It seems that it's very hard for him to get back to his earlier life even if he manages to escape GAR - as soon as he starts doing magic and interacting with people he will be caught again. The way I see it, he is either going to have to flee the country, find new allies, or (more likely) go to a portal world. I look forward to see how the author is going to get Callum out from this.

Rusty Shackleford

I’ll probably check back in after a few more chapters. I really don’t like a cliff like this where the resolution seems obvious (teleport contingency) and I don’t want to be drip fed it over several chapters as they come out.

malcolm white

very tricky author here, good stuff

Eithanaur

I really dont understand why people are so upset. It's the first time Callum made an actual mistake and I like that because it shows that he is afterall still a normal guy who just got thrown into a new world. So many stories nowadays show an MC who just breezes through the story with no hardship at all. I'm glad that the MC in this story actually has to face hardship and his mistakes have actual consequences. Keep doing what you're doing, this Chapter was great!

Alex Lindsay

I thought the chapter was good also. While I wish that I did not have to wait on cliff hangers to be resolved, isn’t it expected on Patreon? I know I am aware of the expected frequency of postings and I am happy to support authors trying to make it. It is worth it to me, though I understand why others may think differently. To me, I feel like I’m supporting the author first, and chapters are more of a bonus which are admittedly important in keeping me engaged.

Reader1

Wished we could get double chapters but alas

2,4,6-Trinitrotoluene

I think he needs to push out more than maybe a chapter a week.

Hotchmeister

More than likely, the only way to do that, is for everyone to still around long enough to provide the author with enough security that they can start writing full time, or they will just break the chapter up into multiple sections considering the length of their chapters. $10 a month is certainly significant, but if we weren’t greedy then the lower subscription would be sufficient.

DevilHeart77

While I like the story, this sort of came out of left field. Restricted knowledge triggered his capture? Knowledge that is available with a five second google search or in medical textbooks? Mages might look down on the mundane but they have to know this is relatively common knowledge that can't be totally suppressed. This being the thing that lead to his being on their radar and getting captured seems waaaaaay too far-fetched.

Joseph Burke

If I were to wizard up a justification, I'd rationalize it to be more along the lines of an incredible lack of mundane schooling being given to those who can properly use magic, combined with the quiet dissapearance/recruitment of people who discover these things, in addition to healing be rare enough anyway. The didn't kill her, they just locked her into a career path with the FBI. The only reason it even mattered, I'd imagine, is because she was taught it by someone, and she's basically a princess. This definitely isn't a normal case, so it's not a good guide to what would tip them off, I'd say.

Brandon Geertson

The mundane world is very separate from the magical world in this story. It's probably not the basic knowledge that is restricted but rather how that knowledge is linked to magic that they have a problem with

fbt

not just that, but our boy has been being an absolute idiot for quite awhile, and it was inevitable it'd catch up with him. He knew he was wanted by an oppressive global gov w/ unlimited (and unknown) powers, knew he should lay low, but just kept sticking his nose in shit. Knew he didn't know what might give him away (he doesn't know enough...he knew that). Kept leaving more and more clues, interacting w/ more and more folks in the community, upping the stakes with mass murder, etc. If he'd had half a brain, or even a little paranoia, he'd have made a half dozen fake identies, cached them, gone entirely offline into the woods somewhere for a year or two, and only after that checked (monitor, observe, wait) the caches. Then gone low profile (not fucking pulling on every string he can, while leaving an ever growing trail) for a few more years, *then* carefully poke around. But, nope. What an idiot. Whether it was Gayle or any of the many other traces he's left didn't really matter. Nor the details on how a pro team designed to take down a mage did so. The bit that annoyed me was the "paranoid mage" on the run consistently acted contrary to his situation to the pt that it almost reads like he wanted to get caught (or was just incredibly stupid and mentally lazy). What the heck part of "on the run" or "lay low" was completely beyond him? I still think the writing is excellent, just that the MC totally earned this outcome. Why he's being an idiot idk, but perhaps authorsan will reveal more at some pt.