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Abigail's Blues (Patreon)

Published:
2024-08-12 14:06:08
Imported:
2026-06

Content

Good morning,

I miss you.

Even before the pandemic came along, I feel like my world was moving toward remote friendships. Now I am excited to see your face on my computer. So much of the love in my life comes through like this. Fiddling with microphone settings because my audio keeps cutting out. Reconnecting to my router so I can see you more clearly. I miss hugging you.

I live far away from everything, and the outside is full of bright light and noise I can't escape from.

God, there are so many people I would smother with kisses if I opened my door and there they were. Cheeks and beards and squeezing hugs and lifting you off the ground and the world is real again. Oh!

I remember all that talk of the global village when I was a teenager. I remember making new friends in far away places on IRC. I remember the magic of never remembering someone's real name, but loving and trusting them. Feeling seen. Appelonia. Zillno. Letters on a screen who became so real.


Now real people are turning into letters on a screen. People I've spent days with, whose couches I've slept on. Who I've been so smitten with - are names now. Aliases. Avatars. Are not even names. Closed their facebooks, and changed their fake names and are gone.

Can you call me? Can I see your face again? Can I hear your voice?

Do you trip over memories of me the way I trip over memories of you?

Joey

Comments

Blue Mask

Someone said something about Epstein casually that really bothered me. They said, I knew he was a creep, who the fuck keeps an address book? And I’ve been offended on behalf of address books since then. Bring back the address book.

Blue Mask

so that we know where everyone we love is at

DAVID WEAVER

"So can I find a little group, or am I so out of the loop with these gadgets? Old addresses that get bounced, strange voicemails that just announce the digits Emails I've not written back I regret it now, I'm losing track of all you Who's even left who's still a friend? Did I wait too long again to call you?" - Jeffrey Lewis

cora von sway

A few months ago I got to meet two long term internet friends in person. People who'd only been words on a screen became actual faces and voices and people I was able to wrap my arms around and squeeze. One of the best things was that I got to see my thrill and joy and love and excitement at having them real and present and huggable aimed back at me. They felt the same. I'd forgotten that was possible.

Chara

I miss some of the people I knew on IRC. Those were my main friends for a few years as a teen, and now I have no idea where they are. Now most of my friends are on Discord, and I always worry about the ones that I have no alternative way to contact. Maybe they don't want me to keep in touch that badly. Maybe our friendships aren't meant to outlast the platform, or our usage of it.

Kate OfTheSea

It has become easier for me to be the "travel to you" friend in the friendships I have. Some think this is tedious and unbalanced. But nothing compares to the reward of being in the company of someone who knows your soul. ❤️

Suzanne Weiner

A dear friend of mine moved two hours away (which isn't even that far, so we don't have any excuse), so we never see each other now. But we trade postcards. He travels a lot and every art museum he goes to, he finds a postcard he likes and sends it to me. I reciprocate, mostly out of my collection, because I don't get to travel as much anymore. I still miss him, but I love trading postcards. It's never the same as seeing your friend, though. He hates hugs, but he gives the best ones anyway.