Lithium (Patreon)

Lithium. I like lithium because doctors don’t know how it works. It’s like electroshock therapy. It works, but why? “Who knows and who cares?”

Doctors, everybody!

Lithium is a mood stabilizer. Which I guess is why I don’t love Christmas anymore.

All my medications are aimed at making me not suicidal or depressed. But when I ask the doctor to throw in one that might cheer me up, I get nothing. Antidepressants prevent depression. Mood stabilizers try and keep you right in the middle. 

The medical community wants you to be right at sea level. Anything more than that would be irresponsible!

How about this one, with the side effect of “a false sense of well-being?” That sounds pretty good. Can I get some of those?

“Oh no, that’s an opiate. That would be irresponsible!”

Oh cool. Cool cool cool. See you next week then?

Irresponsible? Why do I have to be responsible all the fucking time? Can’t I throw caution to the wind for a weekend? I haven’t felt GOOD or HAPPY in so long.

Yours,

Joey