IM/DC Bonus Chapter 17 (Patreon)

The three of them were already bickering when the three of me arrived to fight them. “Yeah, well I won in my universe!” Perpetua screamed at Barbatos while The Batman who laughs laughed. He became an omniversal being when he put his brain in a version of Bruce Wayne that became Doctor Manhattan in his universe. He strengthened his powers by consuming the corpses of Perpetua and Barbatos in his universe.

The version of me on my left quipped. “Yo, we gonna fight or fuck ladies? Times a ticking and we got to show up for the finale soon. Put your dicks away and stop having a pissing contest because you’ll all need to work together to not get flattened in a second.” As if to prove his point he smashed the Darkest Knight away with his will over reality.

We were fighting more as stands than actual people as we each needed to weaken the person's fundamental being before we could damage each other. For a brief moment, I could see the small human-sized evil gods and what they actually would appear like if they were at their full height. The one who attacked the Darkest Knight flew after him with his hands still in his jean pockets. Great, that one was becoming an edge lord.

The clones of the original body all had the tendency to alter their personality the longer they were separated from the real body. He was probably sent to an evil universe and picked up on some of the edginess of the universe he was sent to grow his strength on. The left put on the smuggest smirk I had ever seen before as he chimed in. “I’ll take the girl. It looks like we’re fighting separately for now.”

Fuck… Did I look like that when I smirked? I wanted to punch my own face. Damn, it sucks I should have called dibs on her. Chances are we’d have to kill her but she was still sexier than the other two men in that mantis eating your head off after fucking you kind of way. That meant I got Barbatos… Joy. Whipping out a nth metal switch blade the embodiment of my powers now held a gigantic sword in the same hand.

If anyone watched us fight they’d see people move toward each other then stop and attack from a mile away as the embodiments of our beings clashed against each other. It was like kaiju-sized Jojo stands fighting to weaken the hold each of us had on reality. Each blow was strong enough to split a planet in half, let alone kill most people inside this universe.

No, they were so strong if any made it to Earth they could have it destroyed before I could stop them. That’s why there were so many playing keep away while the weaker threats were dealt with and the more powerful clones held on the more powerful entities.

I had the advantage. If you got a huge weakness like a certain metal can fuck you up that’s the first thing you got to remove from yourself. The switchblade I converted into a gigantic claymore for my embodiment to wield slashed through his embodiment like it was made of paper, each blow weakening his embodiment as the other two were in similar situations.

They should have worked together, then they might have had a chance. I could feel Barbatos weakening the most, I would be the first to kill my entity and couldn’t help but gloat. “Woah, you guys want me to slow down so it’s a competition, or should I just kill this weakling?” Edgelord me spoke up. “Yeah, he really should have removed that nth metal weakness. What a fake true god, he isn’t even worth fighting, you should just kill him.”

I sigh. He was right. I could have cleaved the embodiment of his power in half the first second, having a gigantic weakness like this is just asking to have it exploited. The smug me spoke up next. “Maybe just hurt him real bad. He might have a second boss phase if you don’t kill him too quickly.”

Nah, it wasn’t worth wasting my time. “I’m just going to kill him. Yell if you need help but I’ll just watch your fights.” All of us could fundamentally alter reality and Barbatos tried to run by creating a rift. I let him open the rift, it just didn’t lead to where he thought it would. As he smiled thinking he got away to lick his wounds and make a counterattack he ran right into my sword.

The real body looked down as the real me pierced his chest with the nth switch blade and our embodiments mimicked what happened to our real bodies. I cleaved upwards splitting his top in half before cutting again removing his head from the sliver of connection it still had holding it to his body. I absorb his powers strengthening this clone up into its own multiversal entity.

The paltry attempt the absorption made at corrupting me into the next Barbatos was easy enough to squash with almost no real effort. I let them know. “If you guys take any longer I might kill steal you.” Both called out. “You better not!” That was something all of us had in common. I was fine handing off a weaker enemy but if it was a target of mine I wanted them to myself… Myselves.

I teleport in a canopy seat you’d see on a beachside as I teleport in a bucket of popcorn and an alcohol-free pina colada. The two evil entities started to work together as me and myself did as well. The Darkest Knight also had the weakness to nth metal but the edge lord version of me didn’t have an nth metal weapon. What a waste.

They were slowly losing to me until The Darkest Knight betrayed his own ally, piercing through her to poison smug me. If it was the full version of me he could have shaken off the godly joker gas, but he wasn’t he was a 1% clone like myself that had strengthened himself in a different universe and now had the similar strength to a god. He began to Jokerfy before turning into a puddle, his core beliefs changed so much he could no longer function, and the contingency the main body placed on us killed him.

Perpetua and the smug me were dead but it left The Darkest Knight up to a counterattack. He had his real hand cleaved from his body with the godslayer sword that version of me brought from his own world. It was a strong weapon for sure but it didn’t suit fighting multiversal beings. It was still enough. The fight went on for longer than it should but edge lord me finally won and began absorbing the corpse of The Darkest Knight.

It began slowly with a scoff before he started to chuckle. Breaking into a laugh next, then he began to cackle maniacally. “I’m so much stronger. With this, I can break free of my clone shackles. Hurk!” He looked like he was in pain. “I… Come on. You know how you are. Even if it’s you, we’ll never be fine following orders! I won't be the last that will try to break these bonds!”

He screamed in pain as he started to puddlize. As I recognized him becoming a puppet for The Darkest Knight I sighed and cleave his head off. It was sad, I could have gone down the same road… If my universe wasn’t full of my children that was. Why risk death when I knew for sure I’d be fine as long as I did my job helping him and I could go right back to the universe where I ruled as a god?

Sure, I disliked being enslaved to the main body, but it was this or becoming a fucking puddle. I wasn’t going to become a puddle, I wasn’t some smirky dipshit or edge lord who thought he could defy fate. I was a practical person who set realistic goals like fathering half of the children in my universe.